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contradiction

2nd circle of hell

Member Since 2003

Followers 126 Following 111

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Wednesday May 03, 2006

May 3, 2006
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So here's the rub.

My voice has been destroyed for 3 months. I am missing big sections of my range. It is scaring the piss out of me.

So I finally went to an MD today, who happened to be a bit of a talkative dork (no, I don't watch American Idol, no I don't want to explain my music to you - I just want to get my throat fixed). He said my throat looks awful and gave me antibiotics. Who knows if they work. No clue. I don't have a lot of faith at this point.

Here's a question - why does everyone think that if you are a musician, you are glued to American Idol?? Isn't it the opposite? I imagine models hate the top model show and high-powered executives don't get off on "The Apprentice". These shows make a completely fabricated mockery out of what we do. I will NOT watch that fucking show. I am not sure I have ever seen it. What is the deal?

Also, I wonder...why is it that when I am out with my fiance', everyone asks him if he is a "rock star" or "in a band"? He tells them that "we have a band together" which to most people says "I am the genius, she just sings and looks pretty" (not his fault, of course). But me, no dice. I guess it is because chicks are seen as puppets at best from a musical standpoint. If I tell people that I am a musician, it is always "oh, do you sing? do you have a band?" Uh, yes, along with many other things. And I am the band. Dorkus. Maybe I am just too sensitive. Actually in the last few years I haven't been. It is just a point of curiosity for me. People are either going to get it, or they won't.

My guy is working too much. The energy around our house blows. He's a flipping time bomb a lot of the time. You know, in times like these, I feel the negative side of being in a "bubble" relationship. Yeah, he is my best friend, and that rocks, but it sure would be nice to have a good conversation with someone other than my dogs. I have other friends, that disappear on a regular basis, usually when I have time to hang out. If I delve too much into this "I'm all alone" thing, it's gonna get ugly. So let's cut this off here.

So what's new? It's been a while.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
dragunceol:
i'm moving to Orlando soon, so we might be able to hang out...cause i understand this post so fucking well it hurts.
May 16, 2006
cahrizz:
damn that sucks about the throat. hope i t gets better. i hear lemon juice after a show or what not works for people that don't really sing so much as scream(i've got friends that used this method in their various careers).

when i was home the two frontline bands had genious women as the front'man'. yeah yeah yeahs and the sounds. and another band had a strong female presense. i guess it has to do with the eighties and early ninties where their were those all girl bands that were promoted fairly disgracefully. i don't know what to say other than maybe it's true; maybe since we men can't give birth we create art and when women do it we feel threatened? i can't of course completely buy into that theory otherwise i'm basically calling what i love doing the most a pychosis and i might as well just... anyway. take a wlak if it gets too much so that you don't do anything say anything you regret int he heat of a moment. it's worked for me in the past. that or screaming along to some tool. ciao
May 19, 2006

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