constellationsix

Ufgfh.

I've just been feeling real crap lately. Broke, racking up debt, not thinking clearly, wishing I knew how to play an instrument or had hobbies or something.

I was supposed to go down to Ocean City today. I was gonna get up like 10 and drive down to try and beat the traffic, but I couldn't sleep last night, so I woke up at 12:30, and I'm just chilling, eating breakfast, then I finally leave, but I realize I (of course) forgot some stuff (just sunglasses and my hat and book for...
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God I'm feeling good today. This is the feeling I can usually define as nigh-on-manic happiness, so I hope I'm not feeling all down and mungy later on in the week/day. This week has been particularly laid back, as I continue to enjoy my time off, even if it doesn't really amount to doing a whole lot. Sleeping in, reading (The Crying of Lot 49,...
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SPAM of the day.

I went to see George Carlin like 4 months ago, and ever since ticketmaster is doing that thing where it sends you bulletins of upcoming shows you are bound to love based on previous ticket purchases,

Yesterday -

SUBJECT: Don't miss Whoopi Goldberg

Hey guess what ticketmaster? I will. On purpose. So fuck you ticketmaster.

I was sick this week. Wah. Just sat in bed, read, etc.

Since my operation (about two and a half weeks ago) I've read Crime and Punishment, Night, Animal Farm, Blindness (well, the second half), and Last Exit to Brooklyn. Right now I'm reading The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum, The Crying of Lot 49, and Last of the Mohicans. I haven't read more...
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Life cereal is the bomb.

So I'm going to continuously procrastinate my sum up of my week in the hospital. I've convinced myself that if I write more journal posts (in general...I don't just mean on this site) then time won't pass as quickly...or at least it won't leave with big gaps in my memory where it seems like three or four things happened in the span of an entire...
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It's weird...tomorrow I go in again, and you'd think I'd want to be spending these last couple days with friends (it's gonna be at least two weeks before I can get out of the house/bed), but I'm just chilling at home, wasting hours updating my ipod with recovery-friendly music. I'm spending even more time than I did the last time. Seriously, like half the day...
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I just saw my dad for the first time inabout a year. It was weird, I talked to him twice briefly in January. We had a bit of a blow up last summer when I was staying in Virginia, and I just have not wanted anything to do with him. Now it's just like, whatever. I can't believe I've wasted as much thought and time...
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Wow. Not a whole whole lot has happened in the last month +. Surgery in five days, last day of work today, and insomnia has set in already. I don't even feel that anxious...I guess I am and I just don't know it. It's weird, the only time I remember not being able to sleep last time I went through this (6 1/2 months ago)...
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