well... i'm pretty sure my parents are getting a divore. i'm going with mom, and kelly (bless her heart) said she'll stay with dad. i don't want to be split from my sister though and i also don't want my dad to have hard feelings against me. this morning he went nuts on me out of the blue. he's so fucking paranoid. i talk in a normal voice and he blows up and accuses me of being a smart-ass or having a "tone." he's fucked up. but he's still my dad and i wish i could see this family hold together... but my parents are so out of touch with eachother... it's just insane. anyways i've been with friends all night and thought it best to return. but i came home to my dad gone and my mom sleeping in my bed. it's weird... i don't know what's going to happen but i'm scared. i don't think i'll sleep well tonight. why did this have to happen right now, before christmas and while my boyfriend is in seattle? i need him right now... i miss him... but he'll be home tomorrow night i think. hopefully not too late so he can call me. anyways i'm gonna go... later.

rick