code_red

Well, my leave was well deserved and delicious. I didn't want it to end, but now im back in control of the military... oh the webs we weave.

and now, NOW, my laptop has decided that it wants to crap out. HARD. its like it squatted and decided the best time to take a dump would be the first day i turned it on away...
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im tired and ready to go home right now.

a few more days..........

oh my god so much fucking crap has been going on recently...

my grandmother died, we have reported for training, i just got the details for my op, things are going AMAZING for me and the girl...

I'm in Ft. Lewis now for training, and my body is beat the fuck up. I think I might keep SG. I find myself missing it when I'm...
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Preparing to deploy now.... sorry I have been a ghost.

I leave sunday, and will be back around sept/oct for a 3 week hiatus. then off to see kuwait.

I probably wont renew my SG subscription because, frankly, I don't have time for it and I only chat with like, 2 people on it. Thanks to those people for your support.

That's about it. Thanks...
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My skin feels unsafe. Seriously... I feel like something is building up in the world. This mission is going to pose something in it that no one expected, and I think it will be something extroidinary. I do not know what to expect anymore.

As I sit here, I can feel my soul holding its breath, awaiting a boom that may or may not come....
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I'm leaving for Kuwait.

August.

Next Year I shall return to NY.

awe, so exhausted...

was working 13 hour days....

100,000 people.... damn you fleet week....

now i have to write 3 papers for classes....

just a few more weeks and my stresses are gone...

oh yea, and i think im moving back to NY. I'm looking to hear back from an employer soon.

I am bound for hotel novotel! NYC! On my way! get ready for this cat in NYC Fleet week... stand by...!!!

I have been in a weird mood again. I am worried about school. Worried about my future. Everything seems so uncertain for me it is hard to grasp on to what I am doing with myself.

I miss staring into the sky and wishing for the sunlight to come back to me. I am so tired. I haven't slept in so long, and the nightmares...
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I am really done dealing with this broad. She can't communicate about shit that bothers her, and cannot think for herself. Maybe I am just tired and examining shit too deep... but I doubt it.

Time for an update:

I have an interview for a Fire Dept on April 14th. Also, I went to get screened for my learning disability... i have to wait for testing. the school is going to get back to me about it.

I am also quitting my job and picking up a work study program with the VA. I'll keep shopping for bad-ass jobs that...
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Time for an update:

I'm doing a bit better these days... I started back going to a therapist over at the VA center for my PTSD, which is working out really well. The navy gave me the 20k they owed me, but after taxes it was down to $13,200. Bastards. But it was enough to get me out of debt and put a coin in...
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