today i went out and sat on a picnic bench outside my apartment in the near-torrential rain. i live on in residence on a university campus, and the street in front of my building is pedestrian and bicycle access only. i sat and smiled at the people scurrying by with their umbrellas. some even smiled back.
now i am on my third, or possibly fourth, glass of red wine, and instead of giving the hitherto unexplored second half of my psych 381 textbook a glance (to make at least some attempt at preparing myself for my final tomorrow) i am singing etta james and reading horrible, smutty x-men fanfic. oh, how i love my guilty pleasures.
i am in love with the world. i have not been tipsified in far to long, and my dreams of late have become far too vivid. i think i am finally beginning to forgive myself for things that happened so long ago i can barely remember them.
ps - dear the rinster and the mantis (although i don't know if you still read this)
i miss you both. you bring out the best in me. or at least the most interesting.
9:46pm - my bottle of red wine is now a dead soldier. that always struck me as a strange comparison. my roommate is gone on a canoe trip for the next 10 days. wonder if she has any liquor i can co-opt and replace later?
9:50pm - my roomate's store of alcoholic beverages seems to consist of 2 smirnoff ice's in the fridge. still beggars choosers. you have no idea how much effort it took to find that sign. character map while tipsy cool.
why does the edit function hate me!!!??
10:17pm - oh, wait, it doesen't anymore.
i wrote a new song for the first time in far too longl but i'm too pleasantly tipsy to properly record it for posterity. woot. about damn time.
10:21 - mmmm smirnoff ice. they will always taste like th 11th grade to me. and that will, i believe always make me want to laugh and cry at the same time. at least i'm leaning more to the laughter side these days. god. i was so young. i shudder to think what looking back on this time in my life will feel like after 20 years, when i can muster up so much nostalgia and presumed emotional maturation after 5.
10:34 - according to websites of dubious veracity, i've had the equivalent of 8.3 standard drinks in the last 3 hours. shouldn't i be more incoherent? or is the evidence of my need for quantification evidence enough?
i just remembered what hangovers feel like. erg. where's that water bottle?
10:39 - gah. why am i rocking out with my self-destuct button out? i've been doing pretty well lately what with the running, and the promotion (of a sorts) at work and the ace marks in my summer class. i thought i was nimbly ducking this self-fulfilling prophecy crap. yet still the vodka based girly drink calls me.
now i am on my third, or possibly fourth, glass of red wine, and instead of giving the hitherto unexplored second half of my psych 381 textbook a glance (to make at least some attempt at preparing myself for my final tomorrow) i am singing etta james and reading horrible, smutty x-men fanfic. oh, how i love my guilty pleasures.
i am in love with the world. i have not been tipsified in far to long, and my dreams of late have become far too vivid. i think i am finally beginning to forgive myself for things that happened so long ago i can barely remember them.
ps - dear the rinster and the mantis (although i don't know if you still read this)
i miss you both. you bring out the best in me. or at least the most interesting.
9:46pm - my bottle of red wine is now a dead soldier. that always struck me as a strange comparison. my roommate is gone on a canoe trip for the next 10 days. wonder if she has any liquor i can co-opt and replace later?
9:50pm - my roomate's store of alcoholic beverages seems to consist of 2 smirnoff ice's in the fridge. still beggars choosers. you have no idea how much effort it took to find that sign. character map while tipsy cool.
why does the edit function hate me!!!??
10:17pm - oh, wait, it doesen't anymore.
i wrote a new song for the first time in far too longl but i'm too pleasantly tipsy to properly record it for posterity. woot. about damn time.
10:21 - mmmm smirnoff ice. they will always taste like th 11th grade to me. and that will, i believe always make me want to laugh and cry at the same time. at least i'm leaning more to the laughter side these days. god. i was so young. i shudder to think what looking back on this time in my life will feel like after 20 years, when i can muster up so much nostalgia and presumed emotional maturation after 5.
10:34 - according to websites of dubious veracity, i've had the equivalent of 8.3 standard drinks in the last 3 hours. shouldn't i be more incoherent? or is the evidence of my need for quantification evidence enough?
i just remembered what hangovers feel like. erg. where's that water bottle?
10:39 - gah. why am i rocking out with my self-destuct button out? i've been doing pretty well lately what with the running, and the promotion (of a sorts) at work and the ace marks in my summer class. i thought i was nimbly ducking this self-fulfilling prophecy crap. yet still the vodka based girly drink calls me.
I'm not really much for false eyelashes anyway, they're always someone else's idea. :/