My mother...Lori Ann.
I've been here in Washington since Feb 1. And am not planning on leaving till I know she's okay.
We still don't really know anything yet and can't determine how things will end up. Its all day by day.
The radiation she had from a brain tumor in 1984 has had horrible side effects that have been making her deteirate slowly over the years. This is told to us by the neurologists. I had no fucking clue. It killed so much white matter in her brain. A huge spike in her blood pressure caused a stroke then a brain hemorrhage. Her left side is paralyzed. We dont even know if she truely knows were there. I get small movements and I think she's looking at me....but we cant be sure.
She did however, give the dr. a "thumbs up" the other day.....Well, she lifted her thumb in responce to him...so that makes me believe she does know Im there with her.
She's breathing on her own though. But her air way is so swollen and the prednisone isnt doing much to bring that down. We have to decided soon to either keep the tube in, to at least help her breath...or put in a trach. With the Trach....if she can still talk, she will be able too...with the tube she can not. I wish there was a way to ask her if she's okay.
Till then I just cross that Puget Sound in the freaky ass Farrie every day to Seattle....and stand by her side.
Pray for her please? Even if you're not religious. Send hope and good juju vibes.
Update: Evening...the dr called. She pulled out the tube. Shes in Surgical ICU right now. Shes supposed to be restrained, her right wrist because she tried this before. Its only instinct though....something in your thoat, airway... does not feel good.
They said she should have had a lot more improvement in the first week, but there has been almost nothing.....a lot of brain dammage still. They have no idea how things will end up. Or if she will ever be okay again...
They keep asking us what she would have wanted. We decided that her best most concern would be to be able to communicate with her family/people.
So far, even with the small time that the trach was out, she wasn't talking, according to the Dr. Said she wasn't even trying. She goes back with her head plopped to the right side, left eye closed, and the right ones coated over and staring into space....
fuck, I hope she hears me. I hope she knows that Im there for her and that love her. I tell her that every few minutes that im there...
fuck....
I've been here in Washington since Feb 1. And am not planning on leaving till I know she's okay.
We still don't really know anything yet and can't determine how things will end up. Its all day by day.
The radiation she had from a brain tumor in 1984 has had horrible side effects that have been making her deteirate slowly over the years. This is told to us by the neurologists. I had no fucking clue. It killed so much white matter in her brain. A huge spike in her blood pressure caused a stroke then a brain hemorrhage. Her left side is paralyzed. We dont even know if she truely knows were there. I get small movements and I think she's looking at me....but we cant be sure.
She did however, give the dr. a "thumbs up" the other day.....Well, she lifted her thumb in responce to him...so that makes me believe she does know Im there with her.
She's breathing on her own though. But her air way is so swollen and the prednisone isnt doing much to bring that down. We have to decided soon to either keep the tube in, to at least help her breath...or put in a trach. With the Trach....if she can still talk, she will be able too...with the tube she can not. I wish there was a way to ask her if she's okay.
Till then I just cross that Puget Sound in the freaky ass Farrie every day to Seattle....and stand by her side.
Pray for her please? Even if you're not religious. Send hope and good juju vibes.
Update: Evening...the dr called. She pulled out the tube. Shes in Surgical ICU right now. Shes supposed to be restrained, her right wrist because she tried this before. Its only instinct though....something in your thoat, airway... does not feel good.
They said she should have had a lot more improvement in the first week, but there has been almost nothing.....a lot of brain dammage still. They have no idea how things will end up. Or if she will ever be okay again...
They keep asking us what she would have wanted. We decided that her best most concern would be to be able to communicate with her family/people.
So far, even with the small time that the trach was out, she wasn't talking, according to the Dr. Said she wasn't even trying. She goes back with her head plopped to the right side, left eye closed, and the right ones coated over and staring into space....
fuck, I hope she hears me. I hope she knows that Im there for her and that love her. I tell her that every few minutes that im there...
fuck....