cheshirecat

So my X not the one across the street called me after 4 yrs......she lives in Arizona and we have started talking again.......hMMMmmmm I thiNK I may takE a trIP to thE deSERt.....this woman seriously FucKED mE Up for a wHILE......alhough I played a biG part in IT O course.......I have this ProBLEM Of confronting thingS to thE bITTER END...........I do wanna sleeP with her agaIN anD iT wouLD heLP Me LOse thought oveR that otheR perSON...acroSS thE stREEt............before she left the 1 across the streeT asked what THE Parameters of ouR frieNDSHIP shOULD be....Movies, invite you over,hang out???? I was dumb founded....shE wantS me tO be heR girLFRIenD aLL oF a sUDDEN........buT whEN I speaK to her On hE PhoNe wheN cOMPUTEr DORk byfriend is ovER ...shE is LEss thAn eager to taLK and goeS to the LENGTH of usINg hiM as tHreatening figurE meaninG .....Oh sO you knoW hE maY bE ovER here while I am gONE someTIMEs......and he iS ( I just killed him) But ITS the way shE says iT .....I thinK there is NO way in RealiTY thaT thiS IS goinG to work out.......how can you act two different ways around two people??? which oNe is the reaL heR......iS therE anY balance???? I fEEL I am on a SInkING SUNK shiP with THis ...noT to mention borING ALL oF yOU.......I thinK the tIME is coMINg wheN I wiLL LOSE my sHIT and ...bLow my top and purposely piSs heR ofF to where she wiLL not want me to woRK 4 heR........there is already a weirdneSs going on in thE worK areA.......whY is hE droPpinG moneY oFF in Her accOUNt ?? I have beeN worKINg fr hEr a yeaR noW....It seeMs to be becomiNg a trIumVErT excePt I aM the One LEfT oouT in the dRK.......At least My PeniS that Is. I thinK it S geTTING beTTER buT wheN I sEE him TO quotE Ms. White ...FLAMES ...FLAMEs cOme burNING OUT...........I nEED a PlaN thouuGH before any tHINg ...other wISE I aM goinG to FucK my LIVINg situation UP........I can jusT See mySeLF GOing intO Arizona girLS LIfE...as a deflectoR shIELD...........BUT iTS noT whaT I reaLLY wanT at LeasT tO LEaVE L.A. .............how dOEs OnE gET inTO theSE situationS anD geT ouT....Am I LIEINg tO mySELF abouT thiS wOMAN ....thAt No maTTER whaT yearNINg I haVe aS LOVER or FRieNd It Is OVer anD ImpoSsiBLE. Am I jusT LaceratING my EmoTIONs by continueinG tHis cURRENt PaTh??? ShouLD I TRY A COmpLEteLY New choOse yr advenTURE page because I raN intO a bROkEN wALL.( meaning fucking QUIT....FUCK THIS WOMAN she iS fucKING wiTH mE to get a rise out of ME ) WILL sHe FuCK SOmeBODY In EuROPe ( because she knows she wiLL )...ThuS enDING IT wITH HIPsTER DORK.