chemira

I am finally starting to appreciate myself. For the first time in my life I am going to live my life for myself. Not anyone else. I have been with this new guy for about 4months now and I still cant get over my ex. We both really have strong feelings for each other. I know I have a chance if I want to go back. So I think I am going to go back. The new boy is too controlling for me. I hardly ever see my friends anymore and I flake on them more then I hang out with them. I have been very unhappy with this for a long time. Because I am a very big social butterfly and love to be with my friends. They are the most important thing to me in my life besides my family. I am going to be moving into my own place and have my own space. This will prove to my ex that I am serious because he has said that I always say things but he never takes them seriously because I never hold on to what I say and do it. So I am pretty proud that I am making this happen. I think it has alot to do with all the support I have from my friends. Its a lil scary to me because I am going to have to take things slow with my ex and I am not sure if it will work out. But I am willing to take a shot at it and make that shot count. I believe its worth it for me to try. Its going to be hard to work through the pain I caused my ex but I promised him it wont happen again and I show and prove to him it wont. I love him with everthing. I will do what ever it takes to make this work again. Also to work on myself as well. I think I am going to go back to school. I am going to only take one class at a time though. But I will not pull out this time. For once in my life I am starting to be happy and accomplished in my life. That feels so good.