Ok - honesty time. I've been toying with the idea of doing a set for suicide girls for around 18months now. As soon as I found this place I just knew that I belong here - I'm a real exhibitionist and there aren't many places that I can do what I like to do without being judged. I love to be in front of a camera, with the right photographer I'm comfortable there.
Here is the BUT. If I was to apply to be a suicide girl, what would my motives be? What would I get from it? Would I feel any different about myself than I do now? I honestly don't think that it would change anything. I'm almost completely happy with my physical appearance and sharing myself with you beautiful people makes me feel even sexier. However I'm not sure I could cope with the internet assholes on fb, Twitter and instagram picking my every flaw to pieces. It seems in this world even the most beautiful women can fall fowl of the internet bullies, and I don't want to spoil the good thing that I have here.
Thanks to this website I have a cheeky little secret that makes me smile when things get me down. When those two faced colleagues of mine look down their noses and gossip when my back is turned, I can laugh to myself and think "you don't know me at all. My online friends are soooo much cooler!"
I don't want to be a suicide girl just because it seems to be the "in" thing to do. I mean don't get me wrong, I have so much love for these girls - especially the ones who produce such great art with the beauty they have been given such as @riae, @rambo, @manko, @annalee to name just a few - IF I ever decided to take the plunge I would really want to do something special with it, not just for five minutes of internet fame.
And so this is a decision that I'm not ready to make yet, at least not without alot of advice from others - people more experienced with this kind of thing. For now I'm very happy to share my life and pictures with my gorgeous friends on this marvellous site. And the best thing about that is I can keep my cheeky secret for a bit longer.
Love, your Charlie <3
