chaoticmonkey

-A pain filled leap into the new year-

I could have told you it would end up this way. Alone again, back to where it all began. When i was left cold and aching for love...

January leaves me freezing and empty. If things would have gone as perfect as a sunset over the ocean on a starfilled night, i would have her in my arms right now. Making love to her as we embrace how complete we are when we were together. I pull out her bracelet. Hold it to my lips and breathe in deeply. Memories rush in of a time when heaven opened her arms to me. For a brief moment i had bliss. Tears fill my eyes. I will never have that again. I will never have her again. Dark, depressing music plays in the backround....a testimony to how my life has been.

January leaves me...

And so does the last remaining hopes and dreams of true love.
and i have died inside...

The cold of winter takes its place inside my heart. I watch as women come into and out of my life and all i do is think about her and what it might have been like if she had given us a chance.

February breeds new emotions of a lost soul in a hopeless world.
I play it off...tell myself i just havent met the right person yet
and continue to wear my mask and pretend to be happy

pretend...as i sing my song....

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Someday soon,
I'm gonna pull myself together,
Win or lose,
I'm starting over again..

Start this day,
Like any other day,
Fold my hands,
As I begin to pray,
Sometimes we,
Gotta throw the past aside,
Come what may,
I'm gonna open up my eyes,
To all my broken feelings,
Its the only road I've known,
I just wanna say to you..

Maybe I wont feel the pain,
When you leave me one day,
Maybe it wont be too late,
When you need me someday,
Someone take me away from the one who betrays,
Things wont ever be the same,
I'm starting over..

In days gone by, I was hiding from myself,
In all those lies, and the truth was hard to tell,
But I will try, to turn my life around,
I'll close my eyes so I can finally see..

The road to all my broken feelings,
It's the only one I've known,
I just wanna say to you..

Maybe I wont feel the pain,
When you leave me one day,
Maybe it wont be too late,
When you need me someday,
Someone take me away from the one who betrays,
Things wont ever be the same..

You were my heart,
You were my soul,
You were my breath,
Til I grow old,
You were my blood,
You were my bones,
How could you ever leave me alone,

Maybe I wont feel the pain,
When you leave me one day,
Maybe it wont be too late,
When you need me someday,
Someone take me away from the one who betrays,
Things wont ever be the same..
I just wanna say to you..

Maybe I wont feel the pain,
When you leave me one day,
Maybe it wont be too late,
When you need me someday,
Someone take me away from the one who betrays,
Things wont ever be the same...

I will never be the same...

-Js-
Ruinedforever