chaoticmonkey

Mood : Relaxed...

Listening to : The beauty of silence

Thanksgiving is coming up eh...
I originally thought...like back when i was eleven, that holidays are meant to be spent with family. On a rating of one to ten I would rank family and spending time with the ones you care about as the number one all time best thing in the world to do...which is funny...because that never happens to me anymore. Maybe I'm bitter because I don't really have a family that cares for one another...they would much rather do their own thing. Maybe I'm bitter because I see other people in love, spending time with the people they care about. I see families getting together and imagine what it must feel like to have a family that really cares...

I miss the comfort of love...

Loneliness has its merits....You don't get hurt, you have nobody but yourself to blame for your mistakes, you don't have other people telling you what to do or expecting you to act a certain way...Your free to do and act anyway that you see fit.

But in the end...especially during this season...your reminded of what you used to have...but don't anymore.

I used to have a family...somewhat dysfunctional...but we were together...
I used to have a woman who cared about me...loved me...also somewhat dysfunctional...but nontheless...we were happy...

Now I have Loneliness. But I also have friends. And its funny because the truth of the matter is that most friends aren't really friends at all...they are people you hang with because your bored and need something to do or because your alone and need company...someone to talk to...they aren't friends, at least not in the way that friendship is viewed in my mind. It takes a lot of hard work to have a true friend. In my opinion a TRUE friend is someone you love. Think Girlfriend or Boyfriend but without the intimacy. Thats a true friend. How many people do you seriously call friends that you wouldn't tell something or another too...It's because they aren't friends. The word friend has been stretched and warped...just like the word love. Or the words "I love you"

But I do have friends...or at least a friend...
Whom I'm going to be able to share this thanksgiving with...
And re-live old times from childhood..And it may not be a thanksgiving with family but at least it will be a thanksgiving to remember...

And all of you people that have become my SG friends...I want you all to know that your the closest thing to friends I've had in a long time...people have a problem in todays society where they become fake...but not you all...you are who you are and are not afraid to show it. So Happy thanksgiving everyone and I'm sure I will see all of you in chat at sometime or other

Smooches!!!


-What I Offer-

I can offer friendship
Like a ship without sails
And you can board, view what I have to offer
But where will you go

I can offer comfort
Like a bed without sheets, pillows or blankets
And you can rest, feeling the soft surface of what I have to offer
But can you sleep

I can offer happiness
Like a fire without heat
And you can stare, seeing the warmth of what I have to offer
But will you be warmed

I can offer knowledge
Like a book without words
And you can admire the cover, imagining what I have to offer
But will you be satisfied

I can offer so much more
A fresh new world of exploration and fun
And know that no harm can come to you
Know that you will be accepted

To the princess of my kingdom
Know that what I have to offer I give freely
And what I offer
Is what is in your dreams

---Js---