Consider yourself warned -- If youre not at all a romantic, youll probably want to skip this journal entry and condemn it as sappy. Im going to talk about the end of a crush, a missed romantic opportunity, the regret, and the subsequent personal growth.
And to be super sweet (since were all so busy), Ill be brief.
Im over my crush.
When I turn on my cell phone in the morning, I no longer spend an exaggerated pause waiting for a message alert to ring. My reasoning for the cell-phone silence started withShe doesnt want to seem too anxious went to Those two jobs are probably kicking her but progressed to Shes a sweet little packagebut waay too young and flaky and has finally ended with Shes probably not going to call again and what was I thinking anyway?
Been years since I had a full-blown crush on anybody. Humor me for a minute while I reminisce about why I crushed so hard. Sunny blond California girl (dark roots!!), laid-back attitude, tomboyish like a skater, small package, satisfied smirk. Too rad to put into words. Plusshe seemed game and fate gave us a couple of odd opportunities to run into each other and flirt and exchange phone numbers. Even Chalko grew to crush on her a little.
Time to interject that, prior to meeting her, I had made the decision to play around with delayed gratification. Somy mindset was to take this nice and slow and enjoy the torture.
We got ourselves invited us over to her house one night. I even had her in her backyard all alone with twinkles in her eyes (possibly from the alcohol and pot, but who the heck cares). And at a really nice moment I leaned in to her..and whispered. wed better go inside now..I knowI knowstill cant believe it myself.
She said we would get together that FridayI waited with bated breath but she didnt return my call. I wont bore you with the unreturned text messages that left me a bit depressed. Rest assured I didnt make a fool of myself (think I only called her 3 times over a month). I finally resigned myself to the fact that shes changed her mind.
Nowthats o.k. She could have any number of good reasons and I understand that sometimes the timing of things just doesnt come together. I actually really like the chick and wish her good stuff. This would have only been a fling anyway.
So today only the regret remains. I had the sweetest little opportunity. Carpe diem and all that jazz. Seize the girl on the patio, stupid!!
Lesson learned: Delayed gratification and Seizing the Day both have their rightful place in my game book. Need to have better instinct about how and when to use them.
HeyIm over the waiting for her to call!
but if she happened to ring meI wont be stopping at go or collecting $200Ill be telling her shes beautiful and when can we hang out?
And to be super sweet (since were all so busy), Ill be brief.
Im over my crush.
When I turn on my cell phone in the morning, I no longer spend an exaggerated pause waiting for a message alert to ring. My reasoning for the cell-phone silence started withShe doesnt want to seem too anxious went to Those two jobs are probably kicking her but progressed to Shes a sweet little packagebut waay too young and flaky and has finally ended with Shes probably not going to call again and what was I thinking anyway?
Been years since I had a full-blown crush on anybody. Humor me for a minute while I reminisce about why I crushed so hard. Sunny blond California girl (dark roots!!), laid-back attitude, tomboyish like a skater, small package, satisfied smirk. Too rad to put into words. Plusshe seemed game and fate gave us a couple of odd opportunities to run into each other and flirt and exchange phone numbers. Even Chalko grew to crush on her a little.
Time to interject that, prior to meeting her, I had made the decision to play around with delayed gratification. Somy mindset was to take this nice and slow and enjoy the torture.
We got ourselves invited us over to her house one night. I even had her in her backyard all alone with twinkles in her eyes (possibly from the alcohol and pot, but who the heck cares). And at a really nice moment I leaned in to her..and whispered. wed better go inside now..I knowI knowstill cant believe it myself.
She said we would get together that FridayI waited with bated breath but she didnt return my call. I wont bore you with the unreturned text messages that left me a bit depressed. Rest assured I didnt make a fool of myself (think I only called her 3 times over a month). I finally resigned myself to the fact that shes changed her mind.
Nowthats o.k. She could have any number of good reasons and I understand that sometimes the timing of things just doesnt come together. I actually really like the chick and wish her good stuff. This would have only been a fling anyway.
So today only the regret remains. I had the sweetest little opportunity. Carpe diem and all that jazz. Seize the girl on the patio, stupid!!
Lesson learned: Delayed gratification and Seizing the Day both have their rightful place in my game book. Need to have better instinct about how and when to use them.
HeyIm over the waiting for her to call!
but if she happened to ring meI wont be stopping at go or collecting $200Ill be telling her shes beautiful and when can we hang out?
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
twinkie:
I wish there were a machine I could just program commands into and it would spit out the scarf 
.
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twinkie:
My dear, many of them are selling quickly!