I had a bit of a relapse today. I thought I was getting on with life - looking after Emily, paying bills, going back to work. Then for some unknown reason, I have been emotionally labile all day. The rational part of my mind condemns me for being self indulgent and the irrational part makes me feel guilty for not missing her more.
I am going to sleep very easily but I wake every couple of hours. I can't remember the contents of my dreams at all which is unusual for me, but I have a very clear impression of what the dreams are about. It is always death.
At work I am in the swing of things, with 3 more trials coming up. But the whole time I am there, in the background of my mind there is a very low hum repeating Cheryl's name over and over. When I stop working on a file, the hum gets louder and then subsides when I find a new file.
I think I will have 1 more indulgent entry on Cheryl and then I will spare you all for a while.
Thank you to everyone who made a comment after the last enry. I actually don't come her for the naked women anymore (not in the mood for obvious reasons), but I love the community that is SG. I aim to be more available for hook ups because I find you guys a great distraction adn comfort. As well, there are some amazing people here that I need to know better.
Postscript - My home computer is seriously fucked and I am going to have to take it into the shop tomorrow (Saturday) for a check up. I can't log in here at work because of blocking software. In short, I won't be here for the better part of the next week - I will catch up with you then. Take care.
Post Postscript - My home computer has apparently blown 2 capacitors which have sprayed fluid all over the inside of the computer. I have just jumped on quickly at work whilst the net nanny seems to be down to say hi, that I will probably be off the air for another week until I can get a new computer and that I am suffering serious withdrawal symptoms from the SGAU community. Thanks for the kind comments and I hope to catch up with you soon once I get a new rig.
C_C
I am going to sleep very easily but I wake every couple of hours. I can't remember the contents of my dreams at all which is unusual for me, but I have a very clear impression of what the dreams are about. It is always death.
At work I am in the swing of things, with 3 more trials coming up. But the whole time I am there, in the background of my mind there is a very low hum repeating Cheryl's name over and over. When I stop working on a file, the hum gets louder and then subsides when I find a new file.
I think I will have 1 more indulgent entry on Cheryl and then I will spare you all for a while.
Thank you to everyone who made a comment after the last enry. I actually don't come her for the naked women anymore (not in the mood for obvious reasons), but I love the community that is SG. I aim to be more available for hook ups because I find you guys a great distraction adn comfort. As well, there are some amazing people here that I need to know better.
Postscript - My home computer is seriously fucked and I am going to have to take it into the shop tomorrow (Saturday) for a check up. I can't log in here at work because of blocking software. In short, I won't be here for the better part of the next week - I will catch up with you then. Take care.
Post Postscript - My home computer has apparently blown 2 capacitors which have sprayed fluid all over the inside of the computer. I have just jumped on quickly at work whilst the net nanny seems to be down to say hi, that I will probably be off the air for another week until I can get a new computer and that I am suffering serious withdrawal symptoms from the SGAU community. Thanks for the kind comments and I hope to catch up with you soon once I get a new rig.
C_C
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
india:
I hope you feel better soon and things work out for you. x
steven:
Flog your boss until he/she gives you a laptop! Chrissakes 