little rant...
These past 3 and half weeks have been utterly insane, I found myself talking to a complete stranger, digging deep and falling hard. I fell in love... I never let anybody get as close as he did. but I find myself still longing for him. I kept telling him I knew what I was getting myself into, I gave my heart away, I hope he still has it. I don't know why it's so easier to vent on here...most likely cuz my friends are too cheap to pay for one of these accounts or just me liking the non biased comments from men I barely know. he's not out of my life, but sort of is. it's one big growing process. I won't lie, the thought of losing him tears me down. I want him to stay in my life, he's everything I ever hoped and dreamed, I want to change for the better. someone he can be proud to call his.
I wouldn't speak of love unless i meant it, i've ventured enough people to know better. I don't know why I feel like crying right now. oh, its love, I adore how it dangles something so precious in front of me and puts it out of reach. I feel so helpless.
guh. I'm so emo I want to kick my own ass. I know I shouldn't be sad. well...it's not a feeling of loss or sadness it's like a sense of fear.
on a plus side. my best friend is a gem, she's been at my side when I've felt like this, like now but she's sleeping on the couch. heh, you spend time being alone for so long you forget how to function when love crashes uninvited into your life
another plus+ I started training for roller derby! but I can't join the I.E divas until i'm 21.... but! i'll have a lot of practice under my belt
These past 3 and half weeks have been utterly insane, I found myself talking to a complete stranger, digging deep and falling hard. I fell in love... I never let anybody get as close as he did. but I find myself still longing for him. I kept telling him I knew what I was getting myself into, I gave my heart away, I hope he still has it. I don't know why it's so easier to vent on here...most likely cuz my friends are too cheap to pay for one of these accounts or just me liking the non biased comments from men I barely know. he's not out of my life, but sort of is. it's one big growing process. I won't lie, the thought of losing him tears me down. I want him to stay in my life, he's everything I ever hoped and dreamed, I want to change for the better. someone he can be proud to call his.
I wouldn't speak of love unless i meant it, i've ventured enough people to know better. I don't know why I feel like crying right now. oh, its love, I adore how it dangles something so precious in front of me and puts it out of reach. I feel so helpless.
guh. I'm so emo I want to kick my own ass. I know I shouldn't be sad. well...it's not a feeling of loss or sadness it's like a sense of fear.
on a plus side. my best friend is a gem, she's been at my side when I've felt like this, like now but she's sleeping on the couch. heh, you spend time being alone for so long you forget how to function when love crashes uninvited into your life
another plus+ I started training for roller derby! but I can't join the I.E divas until i'm 21.... but! i'll have a lot of practice under my belt
On another subject, can you tell me what roller derby is? I am totally unaware of what it is. heh
In the mean time, have some fun.