cattra

snap crackle pop.

sound of my mind.

nothing major.

School is awesome.

Having Mercie just a couple miles away is awesomer.

<3

Im trying to get over it his death but it haunts me.

School starts Monday and I still have a lot to get done. I need my scrubs and I need to fix that financial aide mess and fork over god knows how much cash in order to receive Financial Aide and subsidized loans. I am lucky for once to have money in the bank...
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I don't want to write a real update because my mind and soul are in a bad place now. Thankfully Marilyn Manson wrote what I'm feeling back in the 90's.

"I Want To Disappear"

Look at me now I've got no religion
Look at me now I'm so vacant
Look at me now I was a virgin
Look at me now grew up to be...
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Never have my instincts been so wrong about Thanksgiving. Tonight was wonderful and civilized. My cousin cooked a fabulous meal, and everyone was polite (excluding my dad). lol

I woke up this morning feeling very cynical and realized that I hate Thanksgiving. I need a new tradition. Going to my families house for the day has given me a panic attack and made me vomit already. I'm thinking of just going to a bar. Seriously.

All this talk today about Germany has made me miss it even more. I wish I was back there again.

Sick of looking at my last post.

Odd that today was November 5th, a day they wrote a poem due to the actions of Guy Fawkes

Remember remember the fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot.
I see no reason why gunpowder, treason
Should ever be forgot...

It has duel meaning with the whole thing in Ft. Hood today huh?

Remember remember the fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot.
I see no reason why gunpowder, treason
Should ever be forgot...

Guy Fawkes was hot on that holiday episode of Daria.. remember that?

Onto the grim stuff though///

Rest in Peace, Madolyn Louis Lutz 1932-2009