I have perfected the art of choreography on the Life Fitness machine. I catch, out of the corner of my eye, people on other machines looking at me strangly as my arms, legs, and head move in time with the music screaming into my ears, unheard by anyone else. It's a gift really, this talent of dance I do on the Life Fitness machine. This morning it was Depeche Mode guiding my dance. A challenge really, because it was the first time I invited them to accompany me. So important to mix it up every now and again. I stuck with them through the weight machines as well. However, I needed something more motivating to get me through the last bit of my workout...dips...I don't know if you all know what dips are, I wouldn't know if they hadn't been a part of my life throughout my competitive swimming "career" For me, dips are the hardest part of my workout and the part I enjoy the most. Partially because I never see anyone else doing them and it makes me feel all studly and partially because they make me feel so good. So today, as usual, American Idiot starts pulsating through my ears, the bars and I stare each other down, I step up, arms in position, lift my body into the air, and dip down bringing my elbows to a 90 degree angle and push myself back up, until I have completed 10 of them. I turn around to postition myself differently on the bars to do leg lifts and I see one of the trainers at the gym looking at me with eyes round as saucers, she smiles at me and gives me a few claps...yes, I ROCK THE MOST!!!!
Im not going down on my knees,
Begging you to adore me
Cant you see its misery
And torture for me
When Im misunderstood
Try as hard as you can, Ive tried as hard as I could
To make you see
How important it is for me
Here is a plea
From my heart to you
Nobody knows me
As well as you do
You know how hard it is for me
To shake the disease
That takes hold of my tongue
In situations like these
Understand me
Some people have to be
Permanently together
Lovers devoted to
Each other forever
Now Ive got things to do
And Ive said before that I know you have too
When Im not there
In spirit Ill be there
Here is a plea
From my heart to you
Nobody knows me
As well as you do
You know how hard it is for me
To shake the disease
That takes hold of my tongue
In situations like these
Understand me
Im not going down on my knees,
Begging you to adore me
Cant you see its misery
And torture for me
When Im misunderstood
Try as hard as you can, Ive tried as hard as I could
To make you see
How important it is for me
Here is a plea
From my heart to you
Nobody knows me
As well as you do
You know how hard it is for me
To shake the disease
That takes hold of my tongue
In situations like these
Understand me
Some people have to be
Permanently together
Lovers devoted to
Each other forever
Now Ive got things to do
And Ive said before that I know you have too
When Im not there
In spirit Ill be there
Here is a plea
From my heart to you
Nobody knows me
As well as you do
You know how hard it is for me
To shake the disease
That takes hold of my tongue
In situations like these
Understand me
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Right, here you go, it's the picture I swore no one would see. It's my first foray into comedy facial hair. It failed to impress a whole load of girls too.