thanks for all the concern my sweet friends. i just have a lot of things boucing around my head. no one person is to blame. this is what's on my plate at the moment:
WORK - my boss wants me to move to Costa Rica. this in itself is enough to keep my brain reeling for weeks. weighing the pros and cons of this potential opportunity. figuring and working with numbers and what ifs.
WORK - because of my week in vegas my email has been backed up for almost 2 weeks. at 144 000+ emails to sort through i have taken on a 2nd computer just to process mail, but every so often the fucker crashes and i have to start again. our vp is kicking the techs in the ass but to no avail yet, i've been told a solution should be found next week...while i'm in Cuba (big help there).
LOVE - i miss my bf a whole lot. he's been looking for work in Montreal so that he could move closer, but obviously being an American with no work papers here the cards are played against him from the start. so i start brainstorming about moving closer to him and naturally my family and their potential dissaproval of my moving away pops into my head.
MONEY - with tax season coming up it grabs you by the throat and makes you look at what a fucking shopaholic you've been all year. paying bills, figuring things out, keeping up to date on investments, and reminding myself that i've long fucking overdue for a raise at work and pushing myself to start thinking about having a head to head with the big cheese.
TRIP - i've never loved flying, but don't hate it. i'm looking forward to this trip but am worried i won't be able to unplug my brain and just "BE" on vacation. i've never been on vacation, and even less in the south. will i get sick while i'm there? will some massive tarantula crawl into my bed? will i be comfortable in a fucking bikini on the beach in front of strangers? do i have everything i need?
ME - there are so many things i should be doing, that i could be doing, that i would feel better if i got done! i should work on my sites, damn it i should work on them so bad. i should try to sell more art, i should go talk to that dealer at the gallery about my work. i should start back at the gym seriously 4-5 times a week. i know i feel better and i look better. i should clean out my closet, and give the clothes that are too big to the good will. i should clean out draws full of junk, reformat my computer, work on PSW stuff, visit my grandparents, write to my great aunt in Germany before she passes away and i regret it forever, i should take time to have coffee with friends that i've been meaning to for weeks and months.
get the jist of why a temporary "off" switch might be good once in a while? but i'm ok today, it actually helps to write it out.
WORK - my boss wants me to move to Costa Rica. this in itself is enough to keep my brain reeling for weeks. weighing the pros and cons of this potential opportunity. figuring and working with numbers and what ifs.
WORK - because of my week in vegas my email has been backed up for almost 2 weeks. at 144 000+ emails to sort through i have taken on a 2nd computer just to process mail, but every so often the fucker crashes and i have to start again. our vp is kicking the techs in the ass but to no avail yet, i've been told a solution should be found next week...while i'm in Cuba (big help there).
LOVE - i miss my bf a whole lot. he's been looking for work in Montreal so that he could move closer, but obviously being an American with no work papers here the cards are played against him from the start. so i start brainstorming about moving closer to him and naturally my family and their potential dissaproval of my moving away pops into my head.
MONEY - with tax season coming up it grabs you by the throat and makes you look at what a fucking shopaholic you've been all year. paying bills, figuring things out, keeping up to date on investments, and reminding myself that i've long fucking overdue for a raise at work and pushing myself to start thinking about having a head to head with the big cheese.
TRIP - i've never loved flying, but don't hate it. i'm looking forward to this trip but am worried i won't be able to unplug my brain and just "BE" on vacation. i've never been on vacation, and even less in the south. will i get sick while i'm there? will some massive tarantula crawl into my bed? will i be comfortable in a fucking bikini on the beach in front of strangers? do i have everything i need?
ME - there are so many things i should be doing, that i could be doing, that i would feel better if i got done! i should work on my sites, damn it i should work on them so bad. i should try to sell more art, i should go talk to that dealer at the gallery about my work. i should start back at the gym seriously 4-5 times a week. i know i feel better and i look better. i should clean out my closet, and give the clothes that are too big to the good will. i should clean out draws full of junk, reformat my computer, work on PSW stuff, visit my grandparents, write to my great aunt in Germany before she passes away and i regret it forever, i should take time to have coffee with friends that i've been meaning to for weeks and months.
get the jist of why a temporary "off" switch might be good once in a while? but i'm ok today, it actually helps to write it out.
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Dcrocher... C'est ce qu'il faut faire !
Prends-soins de toi !!