cathedra

It's wednesday, well at least it was today. I've been bummed and mad at myself. I must confess, I made out with the CTO at work 2 days in a row. Once in an abandoned hallway near our office, and the other in the ladies bathroom, door locked, lights out, you figure out the rest. I was insulted that he didn't ask me in there again today, but ARGH, I don't wanna go. I keep telling myself it's really just my EGO that wants to be wanted by him since we almost had a relationship almost 3 years ago, but it didn't happen. It's the little ego fairy in the back of my mind yelling out my ear at him while he's kissing me: "See, see ya stupid schmo...see what you're missing??" She's the same fairy in my mind that has an orgasm when she hears him say "You're the only girl that makes me hard in 2 seconds, not even my girlfriend does that". Niiiice...typical line. He's not a bad guy, it's just my ego sometimes overpowers my brain.

Oh well I was bummed because of what happened, I guess I was dissapointed in myself. But my neighbour and her new flame called me down from my apartment, even tho I was already in my pj's 10 minutes after arriving from work and already had a lighter in my hand about to light up and get smashed. Instead they took me to China Town and fed me. So I am back home now, and just glad that the food that fills my fat belly was not consumed while feeling sorry for myself and watching re-runs of Seinfeld, but consumed with friends and laughter.

Im off to bed, I luv u guys, I luv the PSWs in the group I'm not quite sure what to do with yet, and I especially luv those of you who read my journals and lovingly and honestly comment in it, despite the fact I don't always get around to commenting back. *hugs*