cassy

Happy New Years Eve everyone. I have a few spare moments before running off to do errands and shop, but I wanted to recap, and just say, I hope that everyone has a great/safe New Years Eve, and Year in general. We all deserve to be happy, and don't stop until you get what you want, never settle....

This year has been a year of changes for me. I've moved, I've dealt with horrible job situations (thankfully always had a job but bad boss situations). I've upgraded men (thank God), and even met my love finally in November. Rocky starts lead to strong foundations, and although not perfect, I feel like he loves me and he's in it with me for real, moreso than Josh was. He's not going to run at the first sign of adversity.

I've come to grips with Josh, and the breakup, finally. He's been gone 3 years now, and you would think maybe it's about time for me to stop thinking about him everyday and wondering when he's going to come for me. He's not coming for me. It's hard to make that harsh reality in your mind real....but I realize now that if he and I were meant to be together we would, and we'd fight and push and do anything we could to make it happen - but it has to be 2 ways...not just one. I can't be the cheerleader of our relationship anymore - and now we talk now and again, not every weekend, and we are more like acquaintances than before. I miss him, but I miss the old us, not what we've become.

I've got my own place now, first time in my life, and although it is expensive, it's exciting as I see the possibilities, and I love the privacy. It's a tiny place, I call it the "Treehouse" and it's coming together just fine. Once I get some cash together, I'll pick up a new bed, and it'll really be sweet.

i went to Calgary for the first time and met Neil. Scary, akward, nervous, strange, I never thought I'd be doing that again, and I hope I never have to. The whole first week we were together we didn't really jive, but then it came together, like the amalgamation of fine metals. I'm planning a trip back to Calgary in the end of Jan, for a Wine festival as we have now taken up wine tasting as sort of our hobby. It's exciting, and this year is going to hold very interesting things for us if my gut feeling is right.

i'm pledging to juice fast, because so far it's been doing wonders for me, and I really want to slim down, I'm sick of kind of living in the fat version of my body. After seeing Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead - I ended up picking up a juicer, and going for it. I've lost quite a bit so far, but the holidays and such are a pain, so I will go full stop, tomorrow Jan 1, and continue on until I go see Neil 1/25 or 1/26. I'm excited. In the movie they went 60 days, 30 should be NP. Also, just so you guys know I do eat bananas, and some fruits sometimes, so it's not 100% juice only. I'm also gonna start walking in the am's before work, and also taking hula/bellydancing classes at night. I miss dance so much, I love it and it's my favorite type of exercise I will post on progress.

I'm thankful for everyone I have in my life, even those who often don't say what I want to hear, and those who challenge my thinking. I love my family, although they make me crazy 99% of the time. I adore my brothers little ones as if they were my own <3 I hope everyone has a great 2012, full of fun, memories, prosperity, happiness, and health. Lots of love, Cass