carnalascetic

It would be nice if I could find a happy balance between the days when I'm fearless and ready to knock down any obstacle in my way and the days where I feel utterly helpless and drowning in self-pity. That or at least figure out the triggers that set off those mind states.

There's a tattoo I've wanted to get for quite some time- actually all of the work I've wanted to get done is stuff that I have been desirous of for quite a while. There is one tat in particular that I won't let anyone do except my homie, Keith. Anyone! So I finally called Keith and he's a little booked up. That's an under exaggeration. It looks like I won't be getting that tat done until near the end of July. The cool thing about it is the fact that I'll be getting the tattoo a day after my one year sober anniversary date. That tat sort of corresponds to it very well too.

I might get something simple done in the meantime though. I've been asking around about artists in the area. I'm of the thought that I don't care how good they are; if they're a fucking rockstar asshole- I won't get work done by them. The Stavesacre sort-of logo I have on my left forearm was done by a tweeker, rockstar asshole (although, I didn't know that at the time- I was just going on my friend's gf's advice). It has held up against the test of time, and I get compliments on it. Still, fuck that- and never again. I even hate having to tell people who did it when they ask.

Well I'm off to the portal to hell (Walmart) with my roommate. My plan is to get in and out as quickly as possible and not spend an ass-load of money. "Boxers, I need those. A new table set, sure. Detergent, why not at that price? Fish food? I don't have fish, but yes. How can I not spend money with that roll-back smiley face?"