captainmorgan77

Faced with rampant crime at the her highness's Royal Parks, London formed an elite law enforcement squad called the Park Police. In the ongoing effort to keep up with the Forces of Evil's knack for coming up with dastardly and clever ways to avoid capture, they sealed their greatest minds in a secret bunker two miles below the surface of the earth. Their task: Find...
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My iPod has been missing for a week. I think I'm finally going to cave in and do my yearly car-cleaning three weeks early. It's probably under a Del Taco cup or something. I've been making do with what can be refered to as one of the first iPods, which basically did the same thing except they held 60 minutes of music, with one...
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Okay, I've been meaning to update this thing for a few months, so I might as well do it.

I have my own place again. Three cheers for that. My crazy neighbors are always throwing parties, so another three cheers for that. It's a beautiful thing to step outside on a Saturday morning and see that they've built a beer can pyramid outside of my...
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I went to a concert last weekend. The highlight was when I noticed that the young lady that did the opening act (and sings backup in the main band) kept stealing glances at me in between songs. I was right up front because a chance encounter with a journalist at the fair got me a VIP pass 4 teh w1n, even though I didn't say...
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Well, I did it. I drank a whole bottle of Johnnie Walker Red in 1 1/2 hours, plus 4 shots of brandy (while watching SNL, coincidently. Will Farrell is Genius incarnate), and I feel fine. I would like to say that it means I kick ass, but it also might mean that I drink a weeeee bit too much. I can drink all of my...
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Ok, well, I'm back for good, now. It's crazy how time flies. I blink my eyes, and suddenly three months have flown by. Have I been drunk for three months? Possibly.

Anyways, I'm fairly sober now, and ready to jump back into things. I am getting my website ready for launch. I would like for it to have more than five minutes of content before...
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It's been a while, but I'm back from very important business. More updates and spider-web-removal from my journal to follow.

It takes me drunk to notice how large I look in my pic. That was 13 months and 50 lbs ago. Bless Atkins, I need a new one.

My Spearmint Rhino hat is smushed. I must have fallen asleep on it. But at least it...
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Billy Idol recently released his (nearly) first single in 10 years. Scream can be heard in its entirety here.

It's surprisingly good. Most comeback attempts are ill-fated, but this has me a bit optimistic. I don't expect him to become the phenomenon that he was in the 80's, but it will get his name back out there and expand his fanbase. He's re-teamed with guitarist...
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I've been sitting here all evening, fixing a computer for my mom's friend. She apparently didn't know that Best Buy is the devil, and paid them $80 to say "yep, it's not working. If you want us to fix it, that will be another charge." (I didn't even need to do a web search. I just typed "bestbuysux.org" into the address bar, and sure...
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Everybody in the neighborhood loves this sweet, dear old grandmother's cooking. They find her chocolate cake in particular to be wonderfully addictive.

On the other side of the Atlantic, the world's most notorious criminal organization is back in court. "Why didn't they tell us?", cries one plantiff, as...
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