George Carlin's Theory of Life
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus?
I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch and you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last nine months floating...
...and you finish off as an orgasm.
I couldn't agree more.
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus?
I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch and you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last nine months floating...
...and you finish off as an orgasm.
I couldn't agree more.
synfull:
word. i vote for that...when the universe stops expanding and starts contracting, as many prominent astrophysicists predict may happen, they actually say it is possible for the direction of time to be reversed...and thus in theory those creatures lucky enough to be around billions of years from now when this happens may actually get to test the good George's theory out...(ain't gonna be me, but the whole death by orgasm thing is still something i'm going to look into when my time comes)