caetano

Shining gold and chestnut brown,

Like a warm spring in the middle of glacial ice,

Does she come to me with those eyes so bright and beautiful,

This lady, this goddess,

Baptizing me with her strength and spirit,

She leans down,

Grasping me with her glory,

To lift me up and shake me out,

Make me feel and help me shout.

I am captured by...
Read More

Warrior blood is boiling.
I see the future in her eyes.
I know the rage that is contained,
For now.
Building toward power.
Delicate ...
Flower..
And the hope for sunshine,
In the light of dawn.

SAE

OMG!!! I just came from downtown and I had the most awesome experience. I had come from my friend April's concert across the street at the Overture center, and decided to stop in at this place called the Orpheum theatre/Restaurant and Nightclub. So, when I got there is was 10 min till 10pm and they close the kitchen at 10, but, the cook said it...
Read More

Assholes and Motherfuckers coming through
Sometimes I think I am such and egotistical asshole. I just read my last two posts, and I want to tell myself to go fuck off. And I have been using the word fuck more in the last few days than I have in a long long time. I feel so pathetic sometimes. Like I want to tell myself to...
Read More

I want to first qualify what I mean by {{{HUGS}}} kind of friends. What I mean is people who send {{{HUGS}}} and that is all they send, and that is all they say. They do not want to get involved, they do not have the words to tell me what they really think. They just send {{{HUGS}}} and go about their merry way. Never stopping...
Read More

Body is again thrashed. I want to be fucking scary big by this time next year. And so I might up my 12 hours a week to 15-16 hours a week. I am not sure if it will make a difference, but, it can't hurt. My body seems to be all I can control these days, and I know even that is an illusion. I...
Read More

Not in a good mood at the moment...so...

I will just say AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck,...
Read More

Powerful and painful.
Thoughts lurking in the corners of my awareness.
I am powerful,
My life has a purpose,
And I can be useful to someone.
I am worthwhile.
Fleeting feline kisses,
Hovering in my space,
Warm fish breath and rasping tongue,
Cleaning me like a babe.
The immersion of my reason in emotion,
Blurring my reaction,
Sitting in silent restless,
Pondering stillness.
Hoping to...
Read More

Did I see you standing there?
Lately I have to wonder if I dreamed you.
Yet, still I ache and burn.
Waiting for my future to return.
And with it,
you,
In all your wonder,
To lead me home,
Burning in the hearth,
The light of life unknown,
And yet I know it well.
For in times past,
Witnessed in my slumber,
Though I be...
Read More

This was Evelyn's reply to the E-mail I sent her.....



HI, I am writing to you because, quite frankly I am a little too afraid to try to call you again. I can not stand facing so much anger. I really value our friendship Evelyn, and I am hoping it will be able to continue. I love spending time with you, and I have alot...
Read More

It is sunday and I am getting ready to go meet a friend for breakfast. She and I share a passion for making creative jewelry. I am going to this place called lazy janes, which is most excellent. They have home made food and the most scrumptious scones you will ever taste in your life. Still have not talked to Evelyn. She is out of...
Read More

6:20 pm - Pissed off

The following is from today, April 5th

Well I tried to call Evelyn, and as expected she sounded cold and pissed off. I guess maybe, I should let her call me if and when she is ready. I took the chance though. Because, I need for us to still be friends. I want her in my life. I have gotten...
Read More