cactusgeeves

Halloween and came and went, and I must say I was pretty lame. None of my friends did anything that I know of, and I really didn't feel like going out alone. When I was younger, I would have in a heartbeat, but now, I don't know. My gf lives too far away and had to work anyway, and I felt weird going out alone without her. Maybe too much temptation? Or I'm just lazy? Been feeling more and more depressed lately as 30 approches. Never really bothered me until recently. I shrugged off gray hair, and now a stupid number is getting to me? Maybe it's because my friends are getting older, and our tastes are changing, and I kind of miss the things I did when I was younger. I held myself back a lot when I was younger, and it was really when I was 25 I really became more social and who I wanted to be. It cost me, though. It gave me a smaller window to be crazy. Now, I can still be crazy, but it can have consequences. Like, if I stay out past 2, I need a nap and fell like a turd. I remember when I could drink all night, get 3 hours sleep, and still put in a full days work with no problem. Now, I get pissy if I miss Matlock or something. I need one more adventure, one more last stand, one more thing to tell the world that I will not go peacefully into the night! Oh yes! That is what I need!