on having fun
Im sitting here thinking about having fun. Ashley (my best friend) wanted to find a respective 3rd party to our couple, a bi-partisan friend who would get our brand of humor and is attractive, and has the ability to have good conversations with. I thought about this, offered my 2-cents about this, but never really gave it thought; mainly because of the fact that I know its going nowhere. I mean is this seriously going to happen. No. Not on my front. Im not going to have a job in a week, and Im not going to become friends with anybody there, and to be honest yet again, there was no problem with the old formula. Laryssa (Ashleys ex-girlfriend) was the 3rd friend, but she wasnt my friend in the sense that I could hang out with her as a friend, she was Ashleys girlfriend, and by default she was my friend. It wasnt like we came up to her and we sparked a friendship. See, finding a friend like that is hard in my eyes, especially the type that Ashleys talking about because we dont go out to meet people. We are boring to say the least, and its sad to say that, but we are.
You see theres nothing to do here, and its apparent that I figured this out in the wee hours of the night. I for one dont like to dance. I dont drink that much, Im just totally devoid of being a social person, by all rights I was supposed to be that person who fell in love when I was in high school, and be happy for the rest of my life, but Im not. I called up a few friends tonight and I asked them where do they hang out. A lot of them said the same places, and that they go there like every week. To me that isnt fun, thats routine. I mean does it tend to be fun, doing the same thing EVERY week? I mean and its not THAT social you know. I dont know anymore, it seems like people live with the fact that fun is a scene, like in a movie, you see them having fun, but you really dont see the times when they are bored out of there mind, which for the most part is the majority of the day. Fun is 3-4 hours of a night of maybe 2 days doing what? I dont know. I dont drink so Im not the type of person to get all drunk,, and act like an asshole, and I dont hook up with girls, so what does that leave me? A place to go to do that?
I guess what Im trying to say is what are we going to offer that 3rd friend, whos attractive, and smart, and laughs at our jokes, and whom we are not attracted too? The 2 most boringest people. What is she going to say to herself when she asks me to go to this club. oh Im sorry I have art to do or I dont feel like going cause I cant dance what are we going to offer that person. You cant have your cake and eat it too is what is says. You cant want a friend who has all of these qualities, and expect to be the same person you were before you met them, and thats not saying that your not acting like yourself, its just saying that you have to change to suit the needs of that friend. Or at least change or accept the fact that your not going to have fun for 2-3 hours, maybe some days you would, but your not going to be on that high forever. I guess you just need to come to the point that life IS a series of moments. That having fun, unless your going to go hardcore, is a event which is going to take a moment. Ashleys ex-girlfriend wasnt that, she was a friend because she had no other choice to be anything else. She and Ashley still fucked, they slept in the same bed, and slept overnight, and thats not something I did. That 3rd party doesnt exist in a way, mainly cause shes too perfect, and the situations are too perfect, and its always going to be more of ones friend than the other. Its an odd number 3, one that never works out in friendships especially when it involves someone of the opposite sex, unless you hold the absolute same interest its just hard.
Im sitting here thinking about having fun. Ashley (my best friend) wanted to find a respective 3rd party to our couple, a bi-partisan friend who would get our brand of humor and is attractive, and has the ability to have good conversations with. I thought about this, offered my 2-cents about this, but never really gave it thought; mainly because of the fact that I know its going nowhere. I mean is this seriously going to happen. No. Not on my front. Im not going to have a job in a week, and Im not going to become friends with anybody there, and to be honest yet again, there was no problem with the old formula. Laryssa (Ashleys ex-girlfriend) was the 3rd friend, but she wasnt my friend in the sense that I could hang out with her as a friend, she was Ashleys girlfriend, and by default she was my friend. It wasnt like we came up to her and we sparked a friendship. See, finding a friend like that is hard in my eyes, especially the type that Ashleys talking about because we dont go out to meet people. We are boring to say the least, and its sad to say that, but we are.
You see theres nothing to do here, and its apparent that I figured this out in the wee hours of the night. I for one dont like to dance. I dont drink that much, Im just totally devoid of being a social person, by all rights I was supposed to be that person who fell in love when I was in high school, and be happy for the rest of my life, but Im not. I called up a few friends tonight and I asked them where do they hang out. A lot of them said the same places, and that they go there like every week. To me that isnt fun, thats routine. I mean does it tend to be fun, doing the same thing EVERY week? I mean and its not THAT social you know. I dont know anymore, it seems like people live with the fact that fun is a scene, like in a movie, you see them having fun, but you really dont see the times when they are bored out of there mind, which for the most part is the majority of the day. Fun is 3-4 hours of a night of maybe 2 days doing what? I dont know. I dont drink so Im not the type of person to get all drunk,, and act like an asshole, and I dont hook up with girls, so what does that leave me? A place to go to do that?
I guess what Im trying to say is what are we going to offer that 3rd friend, whos attractive, and smart, and laughs at our jokes, and whom we are not attracted too? The 2 most boringest people. What is she going to say to herself when she asks me to go to this club. oh Im sorry I have art to do or I dont feel like going cause I cant dance what are we going to offer that person. You cant have your cake and eat it too is what is says. You cant want a friend who has all of these qualities, and expect to be the same person you were before you met them, and thats not saying that your not acting like yourself, its just saying that you have to change to suit the needs of that friend. Or at least change or accept the fact that your not going to have fun for 2-3 hours, maybe some days you would, but your not going to be on that high forever. I guess you just need to come to the point that life IS a series of moments. That having fun, unless your going to go hardcore, is a event which is going to take a moment. Ashleys ex-girlfriend wasnt that, she was a friend because she had no other choice to be anything else. She and Ashley still fucked, they slept in the same bed, and slept overnight, and thats not something I did. That 3rd party doesnt exist in a way, mainly cause shes too perfect, and the situations are too perfect, and its always going to be more of ones friend than the other. Its an odd number 3, one that never works out in friendships especially when it involves someone of the opposite sex, unless you hold the absolute same interest its just hard.