buffalobill45

Sitting here thinking about the things in life that are gone and the ones I am still waiting for.....I never realized that my family has shattered so badly, my friends are mostly not in my life and romance is dead. I feel like I am going through the motions most day, like putting together a bookshelf, its easy you know what to do but there is no reward, no challenge, no risk. You know what you get before you do it and afterwards no change. When I was akid, all I wanted to do was grow up so I could experience life, and now all I want is the innocence of discovery and the thrill of first times....I wish I could go to the beach, go to a ballgame, make out on a sofa in a basement with a friends older sister, make love in the tall grass in the country, instead it all so striated and structured that it almost doesn't make sense!