Gah. My self esteem is dangerously low lately. I know it's a combination of a bunch of things...but really, knowing what's causing it and knowing how to fix it are two different things.
I was a total lazy ass this weekend. I had the time to go to the gym both Sat and Sun, but of course I created some lame excuses in my mind. Argh. I guess it all comes part and parcel with battling depression and issues from your past.
Hopefully I'll get the chance to see a new shrink this week. I need to get back to feeling like my strong, able, fabulous self again. I haven't been there in months. I'm at the point now that the way I feel about myself and my body affects my every day life...even if I'm sweating like a whore in church, I still keep that big baggy sweater on....I don't want to meet new people until I get my old body back....I'm ashamed of myself when I see people I know....I don't want to be social...I don't even want to be naked in front of the man I love, for pete's sake.
Ugh.
Well, a new week starts tomorrow. Hopefully some clarity will come along with it.
I was a total lazy ass this weekend. I had the time to go to the gym both Sat and Sun, but of course I created some lame excuses in my mind. Argh. I guess it all comes part and parcel with battling depression and issues from your past.
Hopefully I'll get the chance to see a new shrink this week. I need to get back to feeling like my strong, able, fabulous self again. I haven't been there in months. I'm at the point now that the way I feel about myself and my body affects my every day life...even if I'm sweating like a whore in church, I still keep that big baggy sweater on....I don't want to meet new people until I get my old body back....I'm ashamed of myself when I see people I know....I don't want to be social...I don't even want to be naked in front of the man I love, for pete's sake.
Ugh.
Well, a new week starts tomorrow. Hopefully some clarity will come along with it.
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Y~!