hahaha...
in the last post i said "i'm thankful ryan is back in my life"
god damn it.
he's gone again, with nothing but a "forget about me".
i'm trying.
i've been crying a lot lately, i havn't left the house since Monday.
my friends are all busy with finals or just don't want to see me...
there's no christmas tree in my house, so it's extreamly hard to remember why this month is so fucking special.
i've had this over coming lonely, unwanted feeling for a few weeks.
i've been waking up every afternoon (theres no reason to get up at any given time) and wondering why i'm even awake. i wake up, watch invader zim, try to get someone to hangout, get ditched, cry, watch more zim, nap, watch more zim, and sleep.
that's been my past 4 days.
i don't drive, so it's hard to get places, and if there's nothing to do, i have to sit in the cold until i find a way home.
half the things people are saying when they talk to me are asking for nudes,
unless theyre my friends, then they're trying to cheer me up.
naked naked naked
smile smile smile
please?
i've got no reason to do any of it.
i've got no money and i need to buy christmas presents.
all i want to do is get my pterodactyls on my back,
and my "stay grimey" on my waste.
i don't know why, but for some reason i feel like they'll make me happy.
for someone who keeps getting harrassed for nudes, i don't feel too pretty.
![](https://dz3ixmv6nok8z.cloudfront.net/static/img/ph-508.604ed20cffa9.gif)
in the last post i said "i'm thankful ryan is back in my life"
god damn it.
he's gone again, with nothing but a "forget about me".
i'm trying.
i've been crying a lot lately, i havn't left the house since Monday.
my friends are all busy with finals or just don't want to see me...
there's no christmas tree in my house, so it's extreamly hard to remember why this month is so fucking special.
i've had this over coming lonely, unwanted feeling for a few weeks.
i've been waking up every afternoon (theres no reason to get up at any given time) and wondering why i'm even awake. i wake up, watch invader zim, try to get someone to hangout, get ditched, cry, watch more zim, nap, watch more zim, and sleep.
that's been my past 4 days.
i don't drive, so it's hard to get places, and if there's nothing to do, i have to sit in the cold until i find a way home.
half the things people are saying when they talk to me are asking for nudes,
unless theyre my friends, then they're trying to cheer me up.
naked naked naked
smile smile smile
please?
i've got no reason to do any of it.
i've got no money and i need to buy christmas presents.
all i want to do is get my pterodactyls on my back,
and my "stay grimey" on my waste.
i don't know why, but for some reason i feel like they'll make me happy.
for someone who keeps getting harrassed for nudes, i don't feel too pretty.
![](https://dz3ixmv6nok8z.cloudfront.net/static/img/ph-508.604ed20cffa9.gif)
You'll be ok hun, you just need to find something to do in your afternoons to keep you occupied - make something, get lost in DVDs, anything to keep yourself thinking of anything but your situation. It works for me