So again my blogs have been so few are far between but I feel I may return with some hardcore blogage yay... in retrospect (spelled right?? right??) alot has happened. Let me break it down for ya or for me! A couple months ago I moved back to Canton. I really had no choice to what location I ended up at, it was more so finding a place to live that I could afford without a roomate. Not that I'm anti-roomate or anything. Its just that I had two very terrible expierences back to back. And its something I am not willing to try again until either I A. find the right person or B. get into a relationship that ends up going that route. Both of which are not happening anytime soon. But I AM DOING JUST FINE ON MY OWN!! 
and damn am I proud of myself. Shortly after moving all of my things pretty much on my own. (and by shortly I mean a week) I recieved an offer for a job promotion. I took it because more money was what I needed to boot the store was alot closer which saved me money on gas. At first things were very shakey. I always think the worst possible things are going to happen ie. being hated, not being able to make friends, falling on my ass financally. In the end it has been pretty successful! My x on again off again friendship is still continuing and at this moment I have been busy and its driving him mad. He wants me to be fully open for him to hang out or go to the movies... so on and so forth and well he needs to deal with the fact that I am my own person and he needs to find his own independance.
I have also been loosing weight which is very very exciting. I got to wear my "skinny" pants today and MY ASS LOOKED DAMN GOOD! Yea I know a bit much but hell everyone has those days. I also left my house without any makeup on and still felt pretty. This is a very rare thing for me and honestly I'm enjoying it. It feels good to feel confident again without having to depend on someone to tell me I look good.
Recently I e-mailed my old roomate for money considering the fact that she still owes me a base of $500 and hasn't sent me anything for 2 months. Which irks me and normally I would let it go but really. I used all of my savings to pay for all of the added bills and drama shit I dealt with after she left and I think I deserve the respect of at least getting back the last 2 months of rent she owed me. Now there is the arguement that she was not living in the apartment for the last month but she signed the lease for all of it and to boot half of her shit was there til 2 weeks before our lease was up. I had the option of throwing all of it out but I didn't I didn't even touch any of it. I would only go into her room to feed the fish and observe all that was there.
I still have fond memories of her though. This is something that I haven't spoken a word to anyone of. If given the chance and the money is all paid. I would like to see her again. I'm not angry anymore. The thought of being friends with her hit me like a ton of bricks last night (and the fact that she moved back to michigan last week has put her on my mind).
Last night I went to Cleveland to see Placebo (i still haven't stopped listening to them) & She Wants Revenge. The reason I thought of Miss Ric is because she introduced me to She Wants Revenge and while they were on stage I couldn't help but see snapshots of the year we lived together. Sitting on the floor in the hallway while she was doing her hair talking for hours about the day to day. Sitting in her room talking at the kitchen table talking... cooking dinner together. How we would both wake up in the morning with our hair disheveled and makeup smeard across our faces grunting to make tea and brifely mention what time we worked and who should shower first. She introduced me to so many different thought process, places, really just opended my mind. Looking back at it I still think very highly of her even though I still disagree with her choice in mate. But each to their own and truely when it boils down to it. If it makes them happy it envitably cannot be an evil....
Last night was very humbling. I went with Catt and Angela both are people I don't see often at all. But Catt surprised me with a ticket. I was thrilled. Earlier that day I went to Novi to do well wrok stuff and from there my journey continued to Ypsi or to Catt's. Once I arrived we got in her car and took off to Bedford. Where we met up with Angela and began our trip to Cleveland. We had some amazing conversations...got a tid bit lost but ended up on time. We met up with a couple people the ladies knew. Honestly the best "seat" in the house- the show was general admission and it wasn't packed. Both bands were at eye level and with the whole lighting situation we made eye contact throughout the night. It was amazing... some new some old and the mix of people made it unbelivable. Plus the Agora is a beautiful venue. After we left and took the long road home we stopped at a truck stop to eat cause none of us had all day... I love those times when you feel like you have all the time in the world and we milked it for evey last second. Laughing til our sides hurt about the sillyest (spelling?!?!) of things. After we got to Angela's Catt and I took off to ypsi. Which was honestly the best conversation I've ever had with Catt. On both sides... in the end the days are changing and were growing as people and at the end of the day everything will be ok and if it isn't all of this has happened for a reason. CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE...
"Change your style again... Change your taste in men" I know cliche but hell those two simple pharses have meant a deal to me lately. I am constantly changing weight, hair, makeup, style, new music, car, places i live, friends... its all just how life goes and I'm embracing it. Like in previous post where I droan on and on about boys well... am i looking? no ... have i found someone... maybe? am I content with that situation... at times. At this current state of mind am I really seeking a "realtionship" no more like a friendship. If it turns into that well I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. I like how things are going at this moment. Its fun to not feel pressured to make it happen. With anyone for that matter. I am feeling comfortable in my skin and well damn I am special. I am a cult classic beauty - not typical not GOREgeous just avis... hahaha my mad rhyming skillz.
Tonight--- I called Annie when I got out of my manager meeting. To my dismay I found out she was having troubles with her man (who was on his way over to her place to talk). I dropped everything and frankly said, "If you need me I'm here at all costs." After their conversation she picked me up and we drove aimlessly for 4 hours. More amazing conversations... and another humbling evening.
To quote Perks of Being a Wallflower- "...When all one requires is that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite."
It perfectly describes my weekend. I wouldn't change this for anything.
Now that I've gone on forever and the server has probably timed out
(fingers crossed). I am off to a short nap for I have to be out the door at 8:40 for work. I'm not dreading it for it will be a good day. It is what you make of it
and damn am I proud of myself. Shortly after moving all of my things pretty much on my own. (and by shortly I mean a week) I recieved an offer for a job promotion. I took it because more money was what I needed to boot the store was alot closer which saved me money on gas. At first things were very shakey. I always think the worst possible things are going to happen ie. being hated, not being able to make friends, falling on my ass financally. In the end it has been pretty successful! My x on again off again friendship is still continuing and at this moment I have been busy and its driving him mad. He wants me to be fully open for him to hang out or go to the movies... so on and so forth and well he needs to deal with the fact that I am my own person and he needs to find his own independance.
I have also been loosing weight which is very very exciting. I got to wear my "skinny" pants today and MY ASS LOOKED DAMN GOOD! Yea I know a bit much but hell everyone has those days. I also left my house without any makeup on and still felt pretty. This is a very rare thing for me and honestly I'm enjoying it. It feels good to feel confident again without having to depend on someone to tell me I look good.
Recently I e-mailed my old roomate for money considering the fact that she still owes me a base of $500 and hasn't sent me anything for 2 months. Which irks me and normally I would let it go but really. I used all of my savings to pay for all of the added bills and drama shit I dealt with after she left and I think I deserve the respect of at least getting back the last 2 months of rent she owed me. Now there is the arguement that she was not living in the apartment for the last month but she signed the lease for all of it and to boot half of her shit was there til 2 weeks before our lease was up. I had the option of throwing all of it out but I didn't I didn't even touch any of it. I would only go into her room to feed the fish and observe all that was there.
I still have fond memories of her though. This is something that I haven't spoken a word to anyone of. If given the chance and the money is all paid. I would like to see her again. I'm not angry anymore. The thought of being friends with her hit me like a ton of bricks last night (and the fact that she moved back to michigan last week has put her on my mind).
Last night I went to Cleveland to see Placebo (i still haven't stopped listening to them) & She Wants Revenge. The reason I thought of Miss Ric is because she introduced me to She Wants Revenge and while they were on stage I couldn't help but see snapshots of the year we lived together. Sitting on the floor in the hallway while she was doing her hair talking for hours about the day to day. Sitting in her room talking at the kitchen table talking... cooking dinner together. How we would both wake up in the morning with our hair disheveled and makeup smeard across our faces grunting to make tea and brifely mention what time we worked and who should shower first. She introduced me to so many different thought process, places, really just opended my mind. Looking back at it I still think very highly of her even though I still disagree with her choice in mate. But each to their own and truely when it boils down to it. If it makes them happy it envitably cannot be an evil....
Last night was very humbling. I went with Catt and Angela both are people I don't see often at all. But Catt surprised me with a ticket. I was thrilled. Earlier that day I went to Novi to do well wrok stuff and from there my journey continued to Ypsi or to Catt's. Once I arrived we got in her car and took off to Bedford. Where we met up with Angela and began our trip to Cleveland. We had some amazing conversations...got a tid bit lost but ended up on time. We met up with a couple people the ladies knew. Honestly the best "seat" in the house- the show was general admission and it wasn't packed. Both bands were at eye level and with the whole lighting situation we made eye contact throughout the night. It was amazing... some new some old and the mix of people made it unbelivable. Plus the Agora is a beautiful venue. After we left and took the long road home we stopped at a truck stop to eat cause none of us had all day... I love those times when you feel like you have all the time in the world and we milked it for evey last second. Laughing til our sides hurt about the sillyest (spelling?!?!) of things. After we got to Angela's Catt and I took off to ypsi. Which was honestly the best conversation I've ever had with Catt. On both sides... in the end the days are changing and were growing as people and at the end of the day everything will be ok and if it isn't all of this has happened for a reason. CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE...
"Change your style again... Change your taste in men" I know cliche but hell those two simple pharses have meant a deal to me lately. I am constantly changing weight, hair, makeup, style, new music, car, places i live, friends... its all just how life goes and I'm embracing it. Like in previous post where I droan on and on about boys well... am i looking? no ... have i found someone... maybe? am I content with that situation... at times. At this current state of mind am I really seeking a "realtionship" no more like a friendship. If it turns into that well I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. I like how things are going at this moment. Its fun to not feel pressured to make it happen. With anyone for that matter. I am feeling comfortable in my skin and well damn I am special. I am a cult classic beauty - not typical not GOREgeous just avis... hahaha my mad rhyming skillz.
Tonight--- I called Annie when I got out of my manager meeting. To my dismay I found out she was having troubles with her man (who was on his way over to her place to talk). I dropped everything and frankly said, "If you need me I'm here at all costs." After their conversation she picked me up and we drove aimlessly for 4 hours. More amazing conversations... and another humbling evening.
To quote Perks of Being a Wallflower- "...When all one requires is that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite."
It perfectly describes my weekend. I wouldn't change this for anything.
Now that I've gone on forever and the server has probably timed out
(fingers crossed). I am off to a short nap for I have to be out the door at 8:40 for work. I'm not dreading it for it will be a good day. It is what you make of it 
fairyjochen:
have a good week!