A forlorn lifeguard stares from the loneliest lifeguard office I have ever seen as the sun sets behind a gloomy sky. I sit on the beach while the waves crash and a young-looking African lady waves at me from above. I’ve seen her several times selling small collectible items near the beach, and I’ve always wanted to smile and say hello. Today she finally waved, after which we exchanged several smiles. Eventually she got into the back of a pickup truck with several of her colleagues and the driver drove off into the darkening evening over bumps that the truck seemed incapable of handling. A different life… one that cannot be easy. Once again, it crashes down upon me that I am extremely fortunate. We all suffer to a certain extent, some suffer more than others. Often, those who suffer more still retain a smile and a kindness that those more fortunate will never know. It begins to rain, and I stare out into the abyss of open ocean and contemplate the future. Standing up, I start to search for seashells to take back to a lady I have met back in the US, a lady who is eagerly awaiting my return, and I still often lack the understanding of why anyone would want to see me.
And now it is my last full day here. It has been a lengthy period of time - three weeks. Longer than I have spent with my parents for many years. Possible thanks to the fact that we can now work remotely for periods of time. The final day is always bittersweet… it is rich with the promise of one’s own space and all of the comforts of one’s own home, but it is also saturated with the knowledge that a painful goodbye lurks ominously around the corner. Once on the plane, sipping a drink, things start to feel better, but then comes the deep contemplation that arrives with long flights… pondering what is next, what is right, what is wrong, what do you want and where do you want to be?
Margate morning:
Southport evening: