bonnieblu

For the first time in my life i've found myself feeling insecure and inadequate over someone who is younger, prettier, sexier and geekier than myself.
My best mate has found a wonderful new girlfriend who makes him so happy he's walking around with a shit eating grin 24/7. She's a stripper at a local club, she added me on her myspace and i just feel my whole identity has been totally shat on.

Oh wells, time for me to get my act together i suppose. It's strange becuase i've always felt maybe a niggling effect of this but i've never let it get to me as much as this one chick. I thought maybe the reason was because i secretly really fancy my mate and now he's dating someone like me but better and im all jealous. Than i called myself a dickhead for thinking that and put it to watching too much daytime tele.

I really dont understand why im letting it get to me. She's taller and thinner than me and while i've always felt confident about my body this one chick leaves me feeling like a big fat lump with personality but not pretty enough to cut it. She literaly is like the popular hot one.

I love how i relate eveything in my life to films. Guess i am doing the right course.

There's a hot mechanic dude who comes into work, he has tat's piercings and emo hair. I served him yesterday for the first time and got all giggly afterwards. But then i got that pang of "Oh someone like that would never like me"

Insecurities on show...for all the world to see.