One of the hardest things about doing this series of blogs is the difficulty navigating the SG archives.
Specifically this: you can scroll and scroll a FUCK TON and get back to January or February of a certain year.
BUT, if you make the mistake of clicking on a set you like and opening it, IT KICKS YOU BACK TO DECEMBER!!!
11 months…10 months.
If you wanna get back to where you were before you (God, forbid) OPENED a classic set, you’re gonna have to scroll a fuck ton AGAIN.
Granted, this issue does not happen all the time.
But it happens VERY OFTEN.
Fear not, though.
I gotchu.
And December is the easiest month of past years to peruse.
So it is that we come to December 2009.
Let’s check it out together.
The first set to really “draw blood” was the dead-sexy Well Above Average starring @savanah .
Nice ass and LONG legs (in black stockings!).
HAWT!
More big-round-ass goodness can be found in Lace & Leather starring @shyla .
If you need some pretty areolæ, check out @biffles in Surprise Birthday Party!
Looking for some sexy ink?
Check out @candee in Wet Goes Wild .
The first GREAT set of the month was courtesy of a Hopeful named @pennylezy .
Check out her generous boobs in Sunday Morning .
One set which makes really nice use of close-ups is Quiet Reverie by @laihla .
Positively-delicious areolas!
Contributing a very significant set was @spaynx with Speed Queen .
Some nice bazooka breasts there!!
I really dig the sultry @simya in her set Coffee Break .
She looks almost as cool as Bogart smoking that cigarette.
A very French vibe to this set.
Think Serge Gainsbourg.
There’s a nice ass close-up in RIP Baby Lucifer courtesy of @codeine .
REALLY on her game was the stunning @monna in Petite Mademoiselle .
But the first PERFECT set of the month was by a Hopeful who never went Pink (bummer).
Say hello to the ivory skin and rosy nipples of @ayne in Jiminy Peak .
There’s a Gustav Klimt vibe about this one.
Absolutely exquisite!!!
Making savvy use of the color “mint green” was ass queen @deedee in Barcelona .
A very aesthetically-pleasing set!
More ass magic can be found in School Bus Nap starring @yetty .
Fortunately for the home team, Suicide Girls scored a big win with @vallen in Botticellis Niece .
This perfect set compelled me to tip the model.
Please remember that you can tip many of these classic-era sets.
Although not perfect, @sketchy_ comes DAMN CLOSE with the breasty After Hours .
It’s obvious it was shot on the cheap, but it doesn’t matter.
Get a load of those tulip areolæ.
Extraordinary!!
If you’re into that whole “thigh gap” thing (not really my bag), check out the fit-as-fuck @dii in Library .
NICE ass!!
Really special in the Gatsby-esque House on 21st starring soft blonde @duv .
Think Jean Harlow in sensuous sheer lingerie.
Very lovely!!
More ass wizardry can be found in The Spread by @mandalay .
But what makes this bitch particularly hot is her sexy SPINE!
Don’t believe me?
Check out that Jurassic doggy-style close-up of her lower back.
I dig it!
It doesn’t get much hotter than @binah in Harder .
First you got the sweaty rack that JUST WON’T QUIT.
Then you got some booty for the ass crowd.
And some nice, naughty poses.
I tipped this one.
Damn right!
Perfect set 100%.
I can’t tip all these PRINCESSES, so do me a favor and drop a fiver in @squee ‘s tip jar for her fine work in Ball Play .
Another gal who deserves all your tipping is @chloe in Just Before Dusk .
What a fucking great set of pair of tits!!
Charting with some very significant saggy goodness was @atwood in Literary Fiend .
Fantastic set of hangers on that gal!!
Hats off to @smythe for her fair-skinned excellence in Good Neighbour .
Such delicate wonderment!!
Sometimes a set succeeds from the word go (from its title, even).
Such is the case with Alligator Fuckhouse starrring @snowwhitesuicide .
For all you blokes starting a band, please consider Alligator Fuckhouse.
[“We’re Alligator Fuckhouse. Thanks for coming out. This song is called “Crocodildo”.]
Need someone REALLY PRETTY?
Feast your peepers on @naruka in Breathless .
What a smile!
If you’re looking for a QUINTESSENTIAL Suicide Girl (pale skin, black hair, amazing tattoos…), check out the dark stockings on @kamy in Hotel Holley .
IMPRESSIVE ass!
[and a master class in arched-back posing!]
For some rosy areolæ (and an ass Ingres would have dug), check out @riiddle in Its Like That .
Now for some of the coolest make-up I’ve ever seen on SG.
What could be hipper than Buffalo ‘66 blue eye shadow?
How about if you CIRCLE both fucking eyes with it?!?
That’s exactly what @anhayulia does in the cyberpunk Ziggy glam of Sexy Salvajismo For Ever .
Now for a PERFECT PERFECT set (which, surprisingly, doesn’t rely on tits alone) from a Hopeful named @sabetha .
Dream On features a svelte red-haired hipster sucking on a yellow lollipop.
It features ROSY areolas (they look like they been run over with a truck [nice look!]).
It features green (and blue) pastel guitars.
And this gal was CHISELED!
Holy fugging shid!!!
Look at that torso.
Jesus Mary mother of God.
What a Greek goddess!!!
And then there’s the SM58 in the ass crack.
Gives ASMR a whole new meaning.
As for that ass, it’s enough to get a boob man “saluting”.
Fucking hell this is an AMAZING set.
[and, of course, it’s by a Hopeful who never went Pink. How embarrassing for all involved.]
Need some brown areolas?
Me too!
Check out the braille-like Montgomery glands on @susset in Post Game .
For a fresh and clean gal with a boyish haircut, check out @nastusia in Gold Rush .
If you need some VERY INTERESTING nipple piercings (who doesn’t?!?), check out superstar @knitzy in Naked If I Want To .
I love the pink-opaque breast close-ups!
If you like the tan gals, check out the coral nipples on @sunshine in Loose Women .
Some of the coolest poses of the month (along with fascinating camera angles) can be found in Lazy Boy starring the exotic @enygma .
Definitely some fascinating shades of beige (khaki?) in that one!
If you like pert little asses atop a pair of black stockings, you simply MUST see the hair-flipping panache of @pia in 4th Floor .
That is a SUPERSTAR ass!!
More ass (this one of a more generous nature) in the fleshy annals of SG history can be found in Yesterday starring @roach .
Nice, heavy butt.
I dig it!
I like my gals on the thick side.
Which is also why I think Pretty in Plaid by @missvicious is a perfect set.
Sure, she ain’t got a tight stomach, but nothing else on her is tight either (a good thing in some ways).
Who wants tight, squeaking, fake tits?
Not me.
Gimme the real thing, man!!!
More poetic booty can be found within the pages of A Christmas Dream starring the lovely @abbiss .
Nice rear end!
Looking MIGHTY FINE was @lainee in Bike Scene .
This set DID NOT get the love it deserved.
Gal was lookin’ HAWT!!
If you like your gals bathed in light (and posed like dahlias), check out the artful @ursulla in Novio .
Alright, let’s end this ass-tastic month off with a nice, plump rump.
It’s @acey in Leaves of Change .
With the increased popularity of rap music came a global shift away from tits towards asses (much to my chagrin).
But it is my sworn duty as a historian to recognize excellence where I see it.
Buns CAN be wonderful.
—Pauly Deathwish
