Here in Texas (where I live), we are roasting our fucking asses off this summer.
But thank Christ I can go back into the SG archives…to the cool, autumnal days of November 2007 and sit beside a Crystal Lake with @toalmostbe —a Hopeful who never made it.
This one actually breaks my heart.
Get a load of those all-world jugs.
What the fuck?!?
But you gotta roll with the punches.
So we move on to @sakeena to build castles made of sand.
Dig her Spanish castle magic in Freedom Dance .
She starts off in a burqa…and ends up using her finger to write on the shifting sands.
A beautiful bit of cinematography there.
And then we soon get to a set I tipped yesterday [sic]: Keys N Roses by @sweety .
I tipped six sets yesterday.
Five were by currently-active models.
But please remember that you can tip these classic sets (if the girl is Pink).
Sweety’s debut set was a masterpiece.
Her luscious titties look stellar (especially when pushed together).
So many good sets in Nov. ‘07.
Another exceptional set was Heartbroken by @missaphex .
This one is so powerful that it makes me feel like I’m on drukqs.
Dig those pretty pink nipples!
Then we get to an ultra-minimalist named @nightshade_sg .
She had the balls to submit a set WITH ONLY ONE PICTURE.
Suffice it to say that My Alice Costume. 1 Pic did not propel her to stardom.
It’s a good picture.
But SG was not ready for her conceptual-art statement.
Sometimes what is NOT THERE can be more important than what is there.
I am very impressed with @rizon and her set By the Lakeside —particularly the last three frames.
She’s not in those pictures.
And it’s artful.
Poetic.
Quite a masterful way of persuasively ending off a very good set.
Now for a Suicide Girl who made only one set.
Tone Sur Tone reveals @puck as one of the most beautiful faces I have ever seen on SG.
Seriously.
Check this gal out!
And it won’t costa cent as long as you’re an SG member.
There are so many treasures to be found in the SG archives.
If you can comfortably lick your own nipples, I probably want to meet you.
Which certainly applies to @talena in the excellent tit-licking set Miss Talena .
And these areolas have a sort of wine-red personality.
Just a touch of darkness.
Like Jean Renoir kissing his canvas before beginning a painting.
Ok, ass men (and women), prepare Thy selves to deal with the miracle of @sol in Toilette (perhaps the greatest ass set in SG history).
This one is poetic.
And plenty of legs!
She definitely caught me with her fishnets (and I’m a boob man [obvs]).
As such (boob man), I am a big fan of full-frontal nudity (I imagine your shock).
Get a dose of @calista in Discovering the Garden .
Ten pictures from the end.
Big natural breasts in a corn field?
Yes, please!
Ok, but we need perfection occasionally.
Behold @gidgette in Pirate Picnic .
Areolæ like big, fat slices of salami.
Meat joy indeed!!!
Yummy…
How about some lovely coral-colored areolas?
Yes, please!
Bask in the beauty of @eri in Feng Shui .
For all the daddies out there, I present Cherry Poppin starring a lovely woman of color by the name of @vienna .
This beignet had some powdery boobs to die for!
Ok, but…
Let’s kick it up a notch.
Bam! to the pale perfection of @salliss in Bathtub Blues .
This set really stuck with me..last night…as I hopped in the tub.
This photo set is a master-class in CONTRAST.
And subtlety…
As delicate as braille.
Cool blue.
Blues.
Tenenbaums.
Bathroom lighting done right.
She starts like a bad bitch should…dressed in leather.
Black grit of Gene Vincent.
But then we meet her velvet underground.
Contrast that bleak black with glowing, angelic white.
And with the impressionist pastel touch of fog.
The nipples become the stars.
In a sea of white.
Little buoys of wine.
Bobbing in the bathtub brew.
Brew me a woman.
Make her ten feet tall.
The lips were the stars.
A perfect shade of lipstick chosen.
BOLD red.
Deep.
Profound.
Lips that hold a secret.
And we hang on her every word.
The eyes were the star.
Heavy on the liner.
And mascara.
Gothic.
Like you been cryin’.
‘Cause you got the bathroom blues.
And who shot this masterpiece???
I should have fucking guessed.
None other than @missy : the best photographer in SG history (in my opinion).
An artist with the camera who always GREW in her artistry—who always pushes herself to IMPROVE and put out BETTER AND BETTER stuff.
And that she did.
Bathtub Blues is art.
Fight me, MoMA!
Ok, but we gotta include Sweden, you know?
Even Strindberg painted.
So say hello to @shirley in Volvo : proof that boobs pressed against glass is ALWAYS a good artistic choice.
If you get the hots for Anna Paquin when you see her, then you will DEFINITELY want to check out a PERFECT set by @jenlin entitled Little Fright .
This girl is like a peacock.
Something very Edward Hopper about her look.
I adore this set!
Ok, money on the floor!
Money on the FLO!!!
Holding some ginormous jugs was @maryellen in Strip Poker .
God damn.
But we can do better.
View @zina in Is Wet .
She’s damn-near sucking off a faucet in this one.
And I got NO PROBLEM with that.
With pin-up photography, it’s all what you are ALLUDING to.
Like the best filmmaker ever (Hitchcock), much is left up to the imagination.
This leads to timeless stuff.
Ok, let’s have some ass, shall we?
One gal who knows how to shake it is @monik .
And she sticks that money-maker out to such excellent effect in Locked Out .
This set also playfully frames nipples.
Creative close-ups.
Spiraling cameos.
Perfect breasts are not necessarily big.
Observe the perfect proportions of @gemini in Under Attack .
Just a bit of hang to those boobs.
Just a bit of weight.
Heft.
And a delicious palette of color.
Even though I have a budding taste for buttocks.
I don’t know.
I guess…
I just like Don Knotts.
But I also admire @divinity in All in Knots .
Do women get any more beautiful than that?
Not to my knowledge.
And R.D. Laing concurs.
As they say at the FBI, “You can’t have a bomber without an @una .”
And that certainly applies to her explosive set An Angel Morning .
This is the kind of set you want to leap into and wallow around in like a big slobbery dog.
Ruh-roh, Raggy!
We got some serious pics coming at us.
It’s @edwina in Babydoll .
November 2007 was THE MONTH OF THE PRETTY FACE.
Good Lawd, y’all!!!
All this beauty makin’ me PINE and shit.
I’m sittin’ here pining for beauty in this Texas heat.
Because my world is shit.
But the Suicide Girls make US hopeful.
They ain’t meretricious, vacuous bitches (unlike those HOs over at Playboy).
Suicide Girls are the unicorns next door.
In your dreams.
[and mine too]
But sometime you gotta be a wallflower because the art installation calls for it.
Just blend in, you know?
I’ve heard Stripes by @vivaciouseclectic is Bill Murray’s favorite set.
But what the fuck would I know?
I do know the grammar-Nazis are the first line of quality-control defense at SG.
So gals…don’t spell your fucking set wrong.
Ok, on a totally different subject, we have @allisonalley in the excellent Giesha [sic].
Excellent swordplay there in!
I gotta wash myself.
Let’s get absolved with @absolution in Stage Fright Who Me .
I’m in love with this flapper.
Truly.
Bit of P.J. Harvey in there too.
An Art Deco masterpiece.
Her Gatsby is greater than any gat I ever seen.
But we about to go from pistol to Gatling in Slink by @daria .
A perfect set.
And the photo shoot is good too!
Need more black girls up in here!!
And how about @ayane with the double-reach-around??
Both holes covered.
Alluded to.
HAWT!!!
Ok, but, perfection just kept pissing down in November 2007.
Dammit, Jim! I’m a boob man not a…
Mr. Spock: set phasers to stun.
Trekkies dig on @ambermarie in Bound For Pleasure .
This ship is bound for pleasure.
This ship.
Tattoos ON tits are wicked-cool!
Unless it’s some ill-advised, budget shit.
But it looks like Ambermarie did not Shatner the bed in this respect.
And those moon hangers.
Good Lord.
A chest to build a dream on.
Zombies everywhere.
So gimme @odyessey and take me to Delphi to Drink Up .
Holy Jesus.
I was gonna talk about the CIA database known as Oracle (Ampex), but de boobs done ‘stracted me.
My honey done been trapt.
As a CIS man, I approve the message of C is for Candy by @saintcyanide .
Black bras always win.
Ever since American Beauty.
And Workingman’s Dead.
I hear Allah done got the blues.
Don’t be sad, Allah.
Your perfection shineth forth forthwith in the debut set by @astatine : Rare Element .
You could power a Tesla off this fucking set.
Good God!
Boobs like that are just not fair to the other boob-havers.
If you are packin’ tits of that kind of iconic magnitude, you better have a license for those things!!!
License?
Let’s take a shot in the dark with @eyesofatragedy in Goodbye, Ruby Shoesday .
Eyesofatragedy was evidently a gal as fond of an unnecessary pun as me and Finnegans Joyce.
But this dad joke got some spectacular shirt puppies.
Olivia controlled her tremor by joining @roane in Hideaway .
Stick dat ass out and make it wink.
Plenty of hide-the-sausage minds in the gutter on this one.
From bottom to On Top .
Truth be told, Billy Corgan wrote Siamese Dream for the boobs in that set.
Said knockers being attached to @kaaaaaaatje .
But perfection is a bad bitch.
A hard master.
Dear Diary : I have been trapped by @honey .
Pink-capped mountains of white.
Swiss Alps.
The naïveté of Evian.
Pure as a mountain stream.
Banquet beer.
Beggars description.
Hard to follow Honey.
But @dominica does very well in Preppy .
Pink and green always will.
And this lady has the most lovely nipples and areolæ.
I am wine-drunk just gazing at them for but a second.
But we must move.
And change floors.
How about Love in an Elevator ?
A very significant set by @ally .
Make sure when you cup the boobs that you let the nipples poke out between the index and middle fingers.
Ok.
Now to get fucked up.
Painful.
Maybe it’s the birthmark in the shape of Mexico, but this Gorbachev madness is truly freaky.
I speak of @cyanyde in Cyanyde Wax Play .
They tell me it’s a bad trip.
We wanna get LOADED.
And that’s just what we’re gonna do.
We’re gonna have a real good time together with @tana in Easy Rider .
Both tits and ass represented nicely here.
She’s my little T & A.
And i’m an expensive wino.
The new millennium has been defined by hipsters.
Hence, a milky dame dream Beach House by @bracket .
[three] more.
Perfection first.
Nipple-pinching, bruise-wine perfection of @arinnikole in Twenty One .
It’s a small club.
And we’re not in it.
But at least we can have dinner with a mister George Kaplan.
Q: Is it @doe , or DoE?
No matter.
Roadside Color has the expansive, wide-open feel of Los Alamos.
Remember the motherfucking Alamo!
The unexpurgated quote.
Want my F-bomb?
Come and take it.
Ven y tómalo.
Gonzales.
It was two women who made the flag.
Caroline Zumwalt
and Eveline DeWitt.
They could have ended up like those at the Alamo.
Last set.
Wholl Stop the Rain by @ashlynn .
12th shot from the end.
Dirt on skinny knees.
Red from kneeling.
True beauty.
The best shot.
Our flaws make us divine.
—Pauly Deathwish
