Mission statement: what can be learned about SG strictly by looking at the photo sets?
Can a sort of history be cobbled together by going back through the archival photos?
Assume I know nothing.
And I assume you know nothing.
And we dive blithely into a vast catalog of pin-up wonder.
Our expedition currently has us in February of 2005.
SG started in autumn 2001.
Let’s start with a boom.
Let’s start with a mai tai.
Tropical shows off the all-world beauty of @lavonne .
What a way to start!
A golden sunset and Lavonne looking a bit like Milla Jovovich.
Everything is tanned and warm.
Syrupy.
Honeyed.
Lazy.
Content.
Sated.
Satiated.
With fat bellies, we take in the wonder of Lavonne.
This set almost lulls us to sleep at the very outset.
It is an opium din set.
As it were.
But we are soon shaken out of our delicious stupor by the FLASH of @knight .
She hits us with the light of Prom Date .
They could not be more opposite from one another—these two sets—but I love them both.
Varieties are the spice islands of life.
And where there are islands, there is water.
I love black bras.
And big, pale tits.
God damn…
And here you have it: Lake Superior by @stacie .
A bit like the film American Beauty.
And you don’t have to squint and pause to get a load of Thora’s jugs.
One thing I don’t see enough of on SG is smeared mascara.
It’s such an evocative look.
So kudos to the beautiful @thistle for employing it in her wonderfully-vibrant set Beef .
How about a set I tipped last night (because only a fuckin’ weirdo would be home on a Thursday night tipping sets from 2005)?
This masterpiece is called Calculated and it’s a big “fuck you” of sexiness.
“Learn to code”, it retorts.
Ah, well.
I’m content to just gaze upon the natural wonders of @jennrose .
I hope she gets her tip and is able to buy a short coffee at Starbucks.
Hey, that’s as much of a baller as I can afford to be.
For I too am a starving artist.
Which is why I adore the ART these ladies are putting out.
And why I adore this site.
Playboy does nothing for me.
Same for Penthouse and Hustler.
The big porn concerns churn out the same old shit.
But SUICIDE GIRLS got soul.
We continue…
How about some Debauchery ?
Don’t mind if I do…
And @katie & @robin got us covered.
Fishnet stockings on feet reaching up and squeezing the nipples of the other gal?
Yes, please!
If you are not already in love with @elouise , you will be after viewing her set Button .
Good gawd!
I feel like I’m looking at Kathleen Hanna’s sister or something.
[extreme excitement]
But the best set of late-winter/early-spring 2005 was (to my eyes) Love Note by @mallory .
Whose idea was it to have her press her index finger on the frosty window pane?
Who cares.
It’s a stroke of genius!
And it is THE SHOT which defines her set.
It’s not just a pin-up shoot.
It’s poetry.
It makes you feel something.
And that is an extraordinary artifact indeed.
I hope Mallory is also able to enjoy her short coffee from Starbucks.
Believe me, sister, I worked HARD to slip you that tip last night.
But it was a pure pleasure.
Next we move to @alice and her set Filmed .
Alice is just hot as fuck, so you gotta see this!
Ok, who’s ready to get their Lagerfeld on???
Yas!
Next we got @brit with Winter Clothes .
This devilish set sparks a true fire inside me.
It is minimal.
And mischievous.
This girl STRUTS!
Such attitude.
And what an absolute goddess!!
But we gotta keep moving.
Lots of history to cover.
Next we come to a quite-significant set called Goodbye Kitty by @kovu .
This is just a natural wonder right here.
Awe-inspiring.
She doesn’t quite know what to do with her hands.
Or arms.
So she sticks one right through her cleavage.
Well-played!
But we gotta get some cute.
And some more POETRY.
Ready to fall in love with another Suicide Girl?
I give you none other than @zarina in the cinematic Easter Eggs .
Wes Anderson should hire this little lady.
Seriously!
She KNOWS what to do with her face.
Silly, shy, goofy…
Gosh darn it!
My heart thump-thumps for Zarina <3
But no chapter would be complete without a visit from the first great STAR of SG—the fantabulous @mary !!!
And here, in Jungle Cat , she has chopped off most of her hair.
…AND I FUCKING LOVE IT!
What a great change-up!
Spicy!
The bob.
Mary is ready for combat in this olive-green-hued photo set.
I pledge allegiance to Mary.
And to which she stands.
One nation.
Under boobs.
[or is it underboob?]
With Liberty and yada yada…
Oh, look!
It’s @katrina and she’s busy working in the Home Office .
Ooh la la!
Areolas just don’t get enough love.
So click on above link so see some lovely pink halos and be blessed in your journey.
Light and shadow.
Light and shadow.
Used well, they make a model god-like.
Kudos to @anna for being hot as hell!
And thankfully her photographer captured her divine beauty for centuries to come in Mellow Yellow .
Not homesick, but Home Sick was the volcanic @aiki in April of 2005.
This girl really does a fine tutorial on how to pose if you have massive mammaries.
But significance was right on her tail.
Behold @sphinx in The Wall Paintings .
This set is bursting with sexiness.
Like bees on a pomegranate.
Mallarmé would have loved it.
Sometimes you just want a Coors, you know?
A Coors (full-calorie) and some CCR.
And that’s what Nurse in Red by @scarlett feels like to me.
None of that poetry shit.
Just some good old, all-American titties.
Halle-fuckin-lujah.
If you like the decadence of Egon Schiele paintings, focus your lookers on @lexie in Tied Up Teddy .
Naughty, naughty!!
Christ, those are some great boobs…
Are you ready to get physical with @mollydolly ?
Put on some Olivia Newton-John and get your daily cardio to Sprays .
Why go to the gym when you can look REALLY INTENTLY at an SG set???
Ok, two more.
War is hell.
So finding beauty in the midst of war is a heaven-sent miracle.
Why not tag along with @gogo as she shows us The Fortified School .
This set feels important.
It’s like Schindler’s List, but with titties.
Nooo…
That’s a bit tasteless, isn’t it.
Hm.
It’s like a Romanian New Wave film inspired by Bernardo Ber…
Never mind.
Just go check out this cool, survivalist set.
In the midst of hell, Heaven sometimes sprouts up like a flower through the cracks.
Because we all live in darkness, we all relate to Sin City by @malloreigh .
Except some of us live in the country with fresh flowing streams and stuff so those of you will have to just imagine the noir relevance of this set.
Seriously.
It is so well-done.
I am not a comic book person.
I dig Daniel Clowes.
And R. Crumb.
And Sophie Crumb.
And crumbs in general.
Quite nourishing if in sufficient quantity.
But I flipped through AND READ every blurb of text in Malloreigh’s Sin City.
She’s really onto something here.
What I especially dig is how the frames or cells have multiples or her.
Here’s the thing.
As a model (or photographer) for SG, your challenge MAY BE to get the viewer to scroll through the whole set.
And NOT JUST scroll through, but “read” each image.
Whether there’s text or not.
Either that, or a couple of mondo titty close-ups.
It depends.
What is the goal?
Likes?
Tips?
Set of the Day?
They kinda all go together.
But maybe your goal is different.
To go Pink.
That is a noble goal.
Some have been at it forever.
To you that have, don’t give up.
Let me qualify that statement:
if you love making SG sets, then don’t give up.
Don’t let anyone tell you you’re fat or ugly or whatever.
Fuck them!
If your dream is to be a Suicide Girl, THEN DON’T GIVE UP.
And remember, there’s more than one way to peel a potato (that was the vegan version of the skin-a-cat trope).
Put your MIND into it.
SG sets are PSYCHOLOGICAL.
Who is your target audience?
Are they mainly dudes?
What age are they?
What are they INTO?
What is going to speak to THEM?
As I go through these many sets I am just astounded at all the hard work and ASPIRATION that has gone into building the SG Catalog.
All these archived images…
They tell a story.
If you were there when the sets dropped, they tell a different story to you.
For me, I get immense enjoyment out of rifling through these DREAMS and finding the HIDDEN GEMS that speak to me.
I hope you too are finding some cool discoveries as we continue to plow through bedrock of Suicide Girls.
—Pauly Deathwish
