blueeyedmuse

i am stuck in a stagnant depressed rut. i hate those. it seems like every time, i feel it coming on and think oh i've done thise millions of times, no big deal. it still surprises me and at least partially debilatetes me. i hate this, i need to find a good release. i'm already medicated, lol. i just need to bring myself that extra step of finding something to do. i'm waiting for an inspiration to hit me. meanwhile i try to mastrebate to wake my senses up (which usually helps a bit, not this time though) and then get frustrated and easily distracted by my mounting depression. ugh!

i just feel like venting.