When is science going to prove useful. I mean why cant their be a formula for love? or for happiness? or for peace? Would having a magic formula ruin it? isnt love what it is because its elusive? isnt happiness more sublime when we feel like we earned and suffered for it?
What if you find love and happiness where you least expect it and you reject it. Does that make you fucked in the head to want to be unloved and miserable? who wants that?
I DO I DO OVER HERE!!!
wait no that was the old me. I deserve love I deserve happiness. I am starting to realize getting stuff or people to love me wont make this miserable feeling leave.
I need to find more moments where I feel okay just the way shit is right now. Thats the relevation: I dont NEED things to improve it can be better but right now its fine, This is enough thank you I am full of love full of happiness (and full of shit!) Funny thing I was full all along. The hunger is artificial. it isnt real. that is the relevation but sometimes Relevations lead to heavy thoughts sometimes like
I forget that I dont need even you. I dont mean I dont love you that I dont like being with you but I dont NEED you. needing you causes me want to keep you the same the way you are right now that would lead to my wishes conflicting with reality which is going to lead to my disappointment.
What if you find love and happiness where you least expect it and you reject it. Does that make you fucked in the head to want to be unloved and miserable? who wants that?
I DO I DO OVER HERE!!!
wait no that was the old me. I deserve love I deserve happiness. I am starting to realize getting stuff or people to love me wont make this miserable feeling leave.
I need to find more moments where I feel okay just the way shit is right now. Thats the relevation: I dont NEED things to improve it can be better but right now its fine, This is enough thank you I am full of love full of happiness (and full of shit!) Funny thing I was full all along. The hunger is artificial. it isnt real. that is the relevation but sometimes Relevations lead to heavy thoughts sometimes like
I forget that I dont need even you. I dont mean I dont love you that I dont like being with you but I dont NEED you. needing you causes me want to keep you the same the way you are right now that would lead to my wishes conflicting with reality which is going to lead to my disappointment.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
Wow, that is some heavy stuff....and I'm familiar with it too within my own life.
Unfortunately, I am a melancholy person by nature and I CAN have my moments of pollyanna bliss, but I'm always wanting more and 'it' is never enough. But I don't think it's unhealthy. It just makes me unhappy.
My melancholy is a side-effect of my drive, my 'greed' I guess, to find the underlying 'Truth' to everything.
This is where I got into a very scary Nihilist-Existentialist-meets-Eastern-Views-of-Maya zone. 'Maya' in sanskrit means 'Illusion' and refers to the reality around us, that it is as much dream as the thoughts in our head. SO...I got into this place where I reduced everything around me and in me into....well...figments. And then it's scary because you find that you can't live or strive for anything in 'world' anymore. You know it's like one of those Tibetan sand paintings....one breath of wind and it's all as if it never was.
So if I am only a dream, and everything around me has no rules....why am I human? Is what i'm feeling Human or what I assume is human? Where does ambition come from? where does need? where does emotion come from?
it's hard to explain but do you see what I'm getting at?
needless to say, it's hard to avoid being very confused and down about what exactly it's all about. and why you feel sad at all when your sadness is reacting to a dream.
Wire-Guided implies a type of rocket (typically anti armour), which in this case is connected to the launcher by a thin wire that aids in the guidance of said projectile. These sort of weapons are common on bothe the US and Russian manufacturers' showrooms, though the former Soviet nations are far more fond of them than us. I'm not too familiar with these sort of weapons (I focus on air-to-ground munitions), but I hope this helped.