blue_jean_baby

yeah ... yeah...

you're back! you're back!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

okay... that was enough of that...

the back of my throat hurts cause i was going down on my fiance and he jammed it in the back of my throat..

now it feels all... weird...

and i hate when that happens cause when i am not ready for shit like that...i gag and then think i am...
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so what is going on in this boys head??

i ran out on someone today. i was supposed to go to the track and bet on the dogs...

first time ever...

but...i got a werid feeling about it all and just sorta.. quit... came home and made dinner for myself..

something i don't normally do.

so now i am sitting here criticizing every pore of...
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its been a while...

i don't know why i quit writing...

i had to "find myself"

ha ha ha ha....and there really wasn't much there so i decided to turn around and go back to doing the dishes...or listening to music...or ANYTHING...

just as long as i don't open my eyes again...

blue jean babee

just got out of the shower

and am feeling...

i don't know...

frisky?

for the past week i have had these weird up/down emotions...

im tired of people telling me i am manic depressive

im not...

damnit!

blue jean baby

so it all starts here...

or stops...

or whatever...

i have started writing in my journal again...not this online one...

but my real live paper one...

im so confused...

Blue Jean Baby

blah blah blah...

i am tired. and i know i should sleep. and i know i should quit staying up all hours of the night. and i know it is not good for me.

and i know this...

but damn if i don't do it anyway...

since some family members from rhode island are in town, i drove an hour to see them and an...
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i am really glad i do not have to work today.

it gets really frustrating have to listen to all these people bitch and whine at ME when their lawyer doesn't return their phone call.

blah!

and so now i plan on doing nothing ALL day except listen to Bobby Gentry sing Ode To Billy Joe... and fantasize about what exactly it was they were...
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this is my first entry! horray!