blaupunkt:
exactly what it says
So thanks to a good friend (bcguitar33), I'm now a swinging chick on SG and ready to explore some interests...I've got some work to do, like finding a pic of me to put in here for starters, but one step at a time. So thanks jer for the invite 
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blaupunkt:
so...last night I had in most ways the best and in some ways the worst mushroom trip. It was an expedition of self realization and comfort with myself that brought me to my happiest tears several times.
jer and I began in his room, a dark and colorful playground for us to find ourselves, and let the night take us wherever. The visuals were amazing in the dark room, but we suddenly discoverd that it was time to move onto the next phase. Having ventured to my room, we wrote for what seemed like hours and shared our most profound thoughts, which we decided were probably just not as meaningful as we tend to think our own thoughts are. We shared moments of amazing connectedness and clarity. I can't even begin to explain the things I learned about myself...
The bad part came though when we're supposed to head out to a party with the rest of the group. I was coming down, but not down enough after smoking some weed. Suddenly I was forced to face a situation from my near past that had been quite bothersome and somewhat hurtful. I was ok with the presence of this girl involved in that former situation, but my trip convinced me everyone was treating me so awkwardly, with distance and condescension. They all made a bigger deal of what was in my head fairly minor and something I could have dealt with slowly as the night went out. But they didn't want me to turn bad, so they smothered me and wouldn't allow me to just be with a few people or to chill alone. I felt a bit paranoid and thought that I was ruining the night of people because they believe they had to make sure I was ok and doing what I wanted to. So I came back to my room and just relaxed alone on my bed until I fell asleep, which is exactly what the moment called for.
Overall though, this trip was amazing, if only for the absolute happiness it brought me for a few hours. Everything felt right and perfect. If only sober life could be that way...
jer and I began in his room, a dark and colorful playground for us to find ourselves, and let the night take us wherever. The visuals were amazing in the dark room, but we suddenly discoverd that it was time to move onto the next phase. Having ventured to my room, we wrote for what seemed like hours and shared our most profound thoughts, which we decided were probably just not as meaningful as we tend to think our own thoughts are. We shared moments of amazing connectedness and clarity. I can't even begin to explain the things I learned about myself...
The bad part came though when we're supposed to head out to a party with the rest of the group. I was coming down, but not down enough after smoking some weed. Suddenly I was forced to face a situation from my near past that had been quite bothersome and somewhat hurtful. I was ok with the presence of this girl involved in that former situation, but my trip convinced me everyone was treating me so awkwardly, with distance and condescension. They all made a bigger deal of what was in my head fairly minor and something I could have dealt with slowly as the night went out. But they didn't want me to turn bad, so they smothered me and wouldn't allow me to just be with a few people or to chill alone. I felt a bit paranoid and thought that I was ruining the night of people because they believe they had to make sure I was ok and doing what I wanted to. So I came back to my room and just relaxed alone on my bed until I fell asleep, which is exactly what the moment called for.
Overall though, this trip was amazing, if only for the absolute happiness it brought me for a few hours. Everything felt right and perfect. If only sober life could be that way...
robscarlett:
Sober life is often far too sobering for my taste. It only serves to remind me how much fun the other side of the coin can be. 
I hope you enjoyed yer trip for the most part. Take care lady.
I hope you enjoyed yer trip for the most part. Take care lady.