blackcoffeeblues

i had dinner last nite with buddy, he is a funny did we go way back to when we were fucked up kids,, time flies he is divorced with 4 kids; so now he is running from relationship to relationship, any way the food was great, then we saw that movie sideways, it was good i felt it was depressing; my buddy said no it was that i was depressing, may be?? so he drags me to get coffee where ex dating person works told him i didnt want to go in , so we went in ,, we chatted ;hung out tonite , i dont think i want to start dating her again.. me, i will tell her that strate up,, i know people who will just lead other people on , get what they want and thier outta there,, fucking selfish cowards you know who you are,,back to work tomorrow thats alright... been thinking of a chic i used to date ,, i fucked that up,, i realize now how beutifull she was,, how sweet she was,, i could be down with her now, why is that?? i hate that feeling its mr. regret again, two people in two different spots of thier lives it was a waste,, i dont think i have ever been in love if thier is such a thing,, i want someone who i want no fucking games, someone who makes my heart pound take my fucking breath away make me want to change ,, man this journal shit guess its what i needed,,,