bigpappachappa

So th one who I have been pining for got depressed and swore at me and started hanging up on me. she is the one who professes her love for me constntly and says he break up is temporary. I get worried tha t something is realy wrong cus this is unusial behavour for her. I ride my bike over to her school and go see that she is ok. I am also upset at her at that point for swearing at me and haning up over end over again on me. I get upset because after coming all the wqay over there sh continuse to treat me like I am nothing but shit to her citing me asking if she had done any drug that might have caused the uncharictoristic depression over the weekend.
Pissed off that she keeps telling me I am as ass and telling me to leave after teating me like shit I stab my knife into a book. and storm off. My hand slid down the blade cus it is a pocket knife an slised deep. I get over my self and caome back and ask for help. she calls the ems fr the school. I ask here to come to the hospital with me because i am afraid of needles and hospitals in general. she says yes. We go down stairs to wait for the cab and she gets impationt and tells me she needss to eat and just leaves me to go alone.
I am not fucking going alone so I just ride home. On the way I see that she had not gont to the caf at all she went to meet her bf and was talking to him on the stepps of some building. I made my bike miak a lot of noise so she saw me amd just went home, maybe too fast for the icy conditions but whatever. She has not bothered attempting to see if I got home ok or ask why I didnt go to the hospital or contact me at all. this was like 3 hours ago.