bi_photo_chick

I woke up this am and I am really down again...I really am starting to think there is more wrong with me than just plain depression over a cheating husband. I was so happy last night...my girls 9ball team kicked ass last night and we had a fantastic time cracking up and being just plain loud and dumb...it was so fun and I was in such a great mood. Came home put on my cute black lacie you "know whats" and he rolled over & went to sleep then this am I was greeted to kisses and snuggles...so I thought ok here we go alrighty...so I went down under the covers to "you know" and well I guess I should have just rolled over & went back to sleep cause it wasnt happening. It seems like the only time we have sex now is when he wants it and/or if he's had enough to drink that he doesnt give a shit. What the fuck is wrong with me? I just threw back the covers went & got myself a cup of coffee and headed for the shower. Now I am angry & hurt. I got a text message on my cell while in the shower & he "please dont be mad." Well tell me how the hell am I supposed to feel? You know I should have been a full fledged lesbian rather than bi-sexual then maybe all this would never have happened and I wouldnt like cock so much. Sorry yall shitty morning. I mean he told me that is something he wishes I did more (bj), so me being me, I have tried 3-4 times since he expressed this and every freaking time it leads me to feeling hurt, unloved, unattractive, undesired, ect. Fuck it I say, just fuck it! No thats what i want but not gettin. Have a good one everyone...kisses