i'm setting myself up again. i know i am. but i'm tired of being afraid. you're supposed to confront your fears. well, my greatest fear is a short mexican girl, that i loved more than anything in the world, and hurt me worse than the sum total of all the pain i've felt in my life. i know i'm setting myself up, because she either won't respond, or she will. and both of those are bound to end up messing with me in some way.
i haven't really talked to her, since everything happened. i checked her myspace a couple times, but have managed to keep myself from doing so, for quite a while. but i do have this habit of reading our old messages, and afterwards i long to talk to her again. to hear her voice, and not have it just be a momentary lapse in memory.
it only took me a couple years, to get to the point where i could talk to mindy... it's been what... a year and nearly four months now? that's a long time to be unhappy. ha, i sound like i'm new to it.
worked out today, it was nice. i don't really so much enjoy it, but it does feel good. to know that i'm working towards making my body healthy (as healthy as it can be now) and not just not doing things that are bad for it.
paulie and i debaged speccy-V. completely removed all the elbem's from the trunk. now if i could only get rid of that key hole. all that's left is the burger on the grill and the "spec-v"'s on the sides. i'd like the put the altima's "se-r" logo back on, but it kind of doesn't look right. i'll take some pics and get some opinion's from a couple people, to see if the coincide with what i'm thinking.
lost my train of thought... it was still focusing on sara, while i was talking about other things, but drifted off to kristi and a couple other things.
i don't think i mentioned that i had found april's old phone number and messaged it. yeah... she didn't want to talk to me. no, no, i think i did mention this... let's see if we can go for two.
i haven't really talked to her, since everything happened. i checked her myspace a couple times, but have managed to keep myself from doing so, for quite a while. but i do have this habit of reading our old messages, and afterwards i long to talk to her again. to hear her voice, and not have it just be a momentary lapse in memory.
it only took me a couple years, to get to the point where i could talk to mindy... it's been what... a year and nearly four months now? that's a long time to be unhappy. ha, i sound like i'm new to it.
worked out today, it was nice. i don't really so much enjoy it, but it does feel good. to know that i'm working towards making my body healthy (as healthy as it can be now) and not just not doing things that are bad for it.
paulie and i debaged speccy-V. completely removed all the elbem's from the trunk. now if i could only get rid of that key hole. all that's left is the burger on the grill and the "spec-v"'s on the sides. i'd like the put the altima's "se-r" logo back on, but it kind of doesn't look right. i'll take some pics and get some opinion's from a couple people, to see if the coincide with what i'm thinking.
lost my train of thought... it was still focusing on sara, while i was talking about other things, but drifted off to kristi and a couple other things.
i don't think i mentioned that i had found april's old phone number and messaged it. yeah... she didn't want to talk to me. no, no, i think i did mention this... let's see if we can go for two.