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bellensebastian

Member Since 2004

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Saturday Apr 03, 2004

Apr 3, 2004
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I have been listening to the teaches of Peaches. Yes, I fucked the pain away too often. This is why the robot.

Her and I were pen-pals via MSN. Writing partners in crime so to speak. We both were always on the leading edge of something, and always too busy and mostly just reaching out. It was definitely strange because we lived mostly in the same city (except when she was in China or the US). Anyhow, we were always seperated by the glass wall of cyberspace which was cool and very comforting.

Then we decided to meet for her birthday at a Kareoke night. That was the same night that my ex and I broke up. Her and hers did too (not that night but soon within that particular epoch). Anyhow, we hung out as fucking cool plutonic friends. Then she needed a place to stay for a while because she was to be in the city core and did not like a commute. I graciously offerred my bed and promised no hijinks.

Well.. we lay with each other and teased each other and had so much fun. Then the pseudo-dating happened. We literally fell in Love with 1.5 weeks to go before she moved to NY. It was beautiful because we both knew it was somewhat finite. We fucked. We Loved. We Rocked. But we are both in interesting parts of our careers, wanting to focus on money making and shaking and Creating. And that means we have to be apart. Bam. So I am not available because I am Robot. I am not ready again. So I am totally confused and in a great Holding Pattern.

For once I am almost happy living in my own life, doing shit for just me. I love to provide for another, but I don't know if I want to allow that again anytime soon because losing someone sucks Dick. miao!!

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