Right. Last week I had an interview with npower, it was pretty cool. Had to battle through the snow which was an adventure in itself. The job is a resource planning post to help build a new department within the organisation, very high profile and a bit of a (basic) pay rise (obviously my current job has bonuses above base rate that can double my income depending where and when and what we do), but the basic rate is more but with no bonus'. It is however not a technical role, it's business and project management and sort of procedure revising type shake up jobs..... this in itself gives me problems.
Do I .....:
1. Carry on doing the technical job I love to bits, sounds cool as fuck and is cool as fuck. With the prospect of highly paid world travel. But may lead to being the same job for a long time, becoming an experienced engineer takes years and nobody takes you seriously till you're 30.
2. Do an office job where I am working with technical people but never doing it myself. Manageing and stats analyzing and driving around the UK a whole lot. But earn more and have a clearer route to shiny sports car and big house in the country.
I feel like I'm being asked to sell out. The second one has the benefit of being closer to the major population centres I suppose...... but I wouldn't get friday afternoons off or travelling for weekend adventures. Also, I wouldn't be able to cycle to work. MEH!
The other question is...
On this day and the one after a series of odd things happened.
This girl I have been seeing text me a simple and sweet. "I miss you, I hope you're okay in all the snow I'm worrying about you travelling alone"... awww... then, my phone died completely, like dead. I have no other way of contacting her and I think she may believe I am dead. Shit. I liked her. We have a casual relationship anyway, I mean we only see (saw) each other a couple times a month and didn't like talk everyday or antyhing. SO she might not be angry, just annoyed.
Funny thing is.
The next evening an ex.... like the one girl in the whole world that really broke my heart and I swore was my soulmate. A girl that I have so many emotions for at times I'm not sure if I want to drive a sword into her chest and drink sweet tea from her skull fashioned as a mug.... or hold her close and never let her go again, to spend my life with her and raise our children in eternal bliss...... Anyway, she hasn't spoken to me, really, in about 2 years.
Sends me a cry for help. A real sad puppy left in the rain kind of email, followed by another one in close succession. It was touching. But a bit........... late? I dunno. Do you think she's just one of those bitches that treats boys like toys in her toy box? SHe's a bit of a princess....... I normally don't get effected by these things and usually wouldn't care about some ex messaging me a 'I made a mistake' type thing.
But the girl that it is and the sincerity of the emotion and real cry for help. The fact that she actually got in touch with me at all...... it's just. I dunno.
Anyway. A weird week.
Also I'm in charge of SMET tomoz...
.... That's structural mchanical and evironmental test, I have some testing to do, but I'm the only guy from instrumentation there. So everyone will be looking for me with problems with all their own testing.... should be funny.
i know what you mean about loving someone....im exactly the same.
regarding your issue.....its a bit of a difficult one, mainly because of the reason it fell apart. was the only reason cos she was moving away? nothing else? cos its thats the case....then it kinda throws a differnt light on it all.
if she had cheated, been horrible to you, turned into a mega bitch...then i would strongly advise telling her to FO. BUT.....if all that happened was that and unfortunate situation of timeing came inbetween your relationship and made you have to part ways...well.....is she still far away from you? cos surely what bothered her then would bother her now. the distance i mean, if it was the reason she left, surely she will leave again once it gets too hard again.
if she lives closer...it may be worth having a talk to her...find out where she is at mentally. what it is that she really wants, and not just thinks she wants.
i know i made a very hard decision once. before brian the main person in my life was a guy called jay, he was a knob....but hey ho....anyways....he kept leaving me, getting back with me...treated me like a doll, there for when he wanted me....got rid once he had enough.
we broke up....and it seemed final...there had been a bit of time since we spoke...and i was seeing someone else. then i saw him out, and gave me the whole " i love you, i miss you...no body comes close to you, we are made for each other...i cant believe i wasted all this time letting you go and being an arse...im promise i will treat you how you deserve from now on".....thing is...he really meant it. and i believe he really would have tried.....but i knew i had to say now...i knew i had to walk away....it was so heartbrakingly heard to tell him i didnt want to see him again, and walk out....i went home feeling so confused. did i make a mistake? shit! let me go back and tell im ive changed my mind. he was the love of my life....i really didnt think id get over it. i thought i would regreat that night forever.
but now....hes just in the past. hes not the love of my life.....i found someone else who has complletly taken over my heart. much more than jay ever did.
my point is....it is possible to find someone else im sure. someone who more than fills her( the girl in question) boots so to speak.
having said all that....it doesnt sound like the relationahip you had with her was a pretty dire one like mine and jays. so therefore.....there is a chance that perhaps it would work out.
answer this....would you regret it if you didnt give it another go? how much? was the relationship a good one apart from the split?
i realise that im full of clashing advice lol....sorry about that..im trying to work it out in my head but im typing as i go....this is how my decisions are usually made...lol