bee

dear leah,

hi. hey how are you? i am well. today izZz yer birthday. you would have been 22. or u are 22. something like that.i know its no issue the idea of what age. i understand that its just a concept humans use to stage their lives out with. you died almost 7 yearzZz ago. 7 whole yearzZz. no contact with you yet i still feel just as close as we where the last day i ever saw you. some times i sit and wonder what it must be like to have you here with me. what we would have done. and i see it in my head. just us hangin' out. writing like we used to do and trading reading to each other. you taught me so much leah. thank you. i like to think that when my atoms pulsate that they are in the same beat as yourzZz. i know when u play a song just for me leah...even if its on public radio. today izZz your birthday leah and i remember you. i remember your brown eyezZz and i remember your little freckle at the tip top of your leftside point on yer lip, i remember how when you would eat Doritos you would ball up the cheese from he chips on yer fingers and just let it drop to the ground. i remember your dreamzZz like when you fell over on roller skates in our bedroom. i remember the way you would kinda snort when we would laugh. sometimes i laugh right out loud when i think about the time we where trying to go to bed before our first ever day of jr. high and i said to you, "leah...just think...millionzZz of people are having sex right now!"
i remember how we called each other soul sister and had a thing for harry Houdini, prince William and Steven Tyler. i cannot remember who had it for ab Lincoln...i'd like to think it was you yet i have this strange feel it was me. you loved the ocean and dolphins. you wanted to grow and and bEe a lady who interviews bands cuz you love music and you want to travel. i feel like you are music now leah. you were so strong. you saw me like no one will ever see me. i love you leah. i miss you a lot. every day when take a shower...or when i do...i write "hi" in the glass, we always said that if one of us were to die thats how we would keep in touch. i have to tell you this, i remember we also said that we would try our best to call each other from "the great beyond", i still think u are calling when "NO ID" shows on my caller ID. u always wanted me to surf...i will try. there was this little zine we used to make before we even new it was a zine. what rad lil girlzZz we where. we are. leah you and i are rad ladiezZz and i know yer gone but i know you can feel what i feel.

yer soul sister,

bEe JELLYFISH