becca_____

So yesterday this transvestite comes into my work and orders some coffee. A pretty normal transaction, all things considered, until she tells me she needs it because she's having bowel problems. At which point she leans in and says, "I'll tell you a little secret. I'm used to having anal intercourse on a regular basis, and I just don't care for dildos when I can't get the real thing. So now I'm all backed up, and cigarettes and coffee are the only things that help. They just get it all out of me!"

Sometimes I kind of like my job.

Update: My fucking car was stolen. Fucking awesome. I don't even know what to say. I'm at a complete loss right now.