My mom e-mailed me this today.
You know you're from Staten Island when....
1. You refer to Manhattan as "the city."
I also referred to Brooklyn as "the city," too.
2. You can name all four bridges.
Verazanno, Outerbridge, the Bayonne, and Goethals.
3. Denino's Pizza and Ralph's Ices are the best summertime treats and you will wait on line for 45 minutes just for a vanilla chip ice.
Personally, I prefer cherry.
4. You've gone sledding at Latourette.
Every winter. I lived within walking distance.
5. There is only one mall....and it's called "the mall."
I was completely unaware it has a name until this moment.
6. It takes you a half hour to get to your friends house...and they live less than a mile away.
Negatory on this one, I know all the sneaky ways.
7. You know it's Prince's Bay not Princess Bay.
True.
8. You would never swim in the water here.
I try to not even look at it.
9. You take pride in being from the "North Shore."
Fuck that. Richmond Town represent.
10. At least one of your relatives is fluent in Italian.
My grandma picked up Italian swears from her neighbor.
11. You've gotten into arguments with people who think Long Island is the fifth borough. you resent Manhattanites calling you members of the "bridge and tunnel club."
The thing about Long Island is so true. I just resent Manhattanites for being assholes.
12. You can smell the dump from your house but you're so used to the smell that you don't notice it anymore.
I didn't notice it until I moved away and then visited home. God, it smells bad.
13. There is a deli/laundromat/pizza place/drug dealer on every corner.
I don't know who the hell made up this list, but that drug dealer comment is just dumb. The deli and pizzeria thing is true.
14. You've gotten into a screaming match over a parking spot.
Nope. I just park in the furthest out parking lot and walk to the mall.
15. You know everyone on the island through "six degrees of seperation."
Can I help it if I'm popular?
16. You are Irish, Italian, Jewish or some combination thereof.
Yep.
17. Everyone you know claims to be "connected."
I have some shady neighbors. That's all I'm gonna say.
18. Grades 6-8 are called Intermediate School (e.g. IS 61) not middle school or junior high.
IS 24, class of 1990.
19. You've hung out in a parking lot.
Well... yeah, but I've done that in LA, too.
20. You know the difference between Richmond Rd., Richmond Ave., and Richmond Terrace.
Indeed I do.
21. You know that 'Mike' owns all the good diners.
They're so good. Seriously. So fucking good.
22. You refer to every highway on the island as "the Expressway."
I still do this in LA out of habit. People like to laugh at me for it. They can die.
23. You've driven down Bedel St. before it was built up to see if it was haunted.
I admit, this one stumps me. I used to be scared of the burned down old mental institution by my high school.
24. You've been to the Wave.
No, but I'd wager it was down on Bay Street.
25. You've been cut off by a souped up Honda Accord.
Fucking Guidos.
26. You have chased someone for cutting you off just to give them the finger.
Again, I live in Los Angeles. This isn't a Staten Island exclusive activity. Methinks the person behind this list is not a real Staten Islander. And did you see before when they used the phrase "pizza place?" Everyone KNOWS you call it a pizzeria. I smell a phony.
27. A development of townhouses has recently sprung up in your neighborhood.
No just ugly fucking houses in place of pretty old ones.
28. The shocks in your car are shot.
The roads DO suck.
29. You or someone you know suffers from respiratory problems caused by the toxicity of the garbage dump.
Thankfully, I can say no to this one, but there are very sick people living around that thing.
30. We don't have apartment houses, we have Projects.
This one is stupid.
31. You have the need to look at the people in the car next to you when stopped at a red light.
I don't get this one at all.
32. Your weekend hangouts in high school included Dock of the Bay, the Wave, the Caves, the Choir Loft.
Pssssh! I had no friends in high school. My weekend hangout was my room.
You know you're from Staten Island when....
1. You refer to Manhattan as "the city."
I also referred to Brooklyn as "the city," too.
2. You can name all four bridges.
Verazanno, Outerbridge, the Bayonne, and Goethals.
3. Denino's Pizza and Ralph's Ices are the best summertime treats and you will wait on line for 45 minutes just for a vanilla chip ice.
Personally, I prefer cherry.
4. You've gone sledding at Latourette.
Every winter. I lived within walking distance.
5. There is only one mall....and it's called "the mall."
I was completely unaware it has a name until this moment.
6. It takes you a half hour to get to your friends house...and they live less than a mile away.
Negatory on this one, I know all the sneaky ways.
7. You know it's Prince's Bay not Princess Bay.
True.
8. You would never swim in the water here.
I try to not even look at it.
9. You take pride in being from the "North Shore."
Fuck that. Richmond Town represent.
10. At least one of your relatives is fluent in Italian.
My grandma picked up Italian swears from her neighbor.
11. You've gotten into arguments with people who think Long Island is the fifth borough. you resent Manhattanites calling you members of the "bridge and tunnel club."
The thing about Long Island is so true. I just resent Manhattanites for being assholes.
12. You can smell the dump from your house but you're so used to the smell that you don't notice it anymore.
I didn't notice it until I moved away and then visited home. God, it smells bad.
13. There is a deli/laundromat/pizza place/drug dealer on every corner.
I don't know who the hell made up this list, but that drug dealer comment is just dumb. The deli and pizzeria thing is true.
14. You've gotten into a screaming match over a parking spot.
Nope. I just park in the furthest out parking lot and walk to the mall.
15. You know everyone on the island through "six degrees of seperation."
Can I help it if I'm popular?
16. You are Irish, Italian, Jewish or some combination thereof.
Yep.
17. Everyone you know claims to be "connected."
I have some shady neighbors. That's all I'm gonna say.
18. Grades 6-8 are called Intermediate School (e.g. IS 61) not middle school or junior high.
IS 24, class of 1990.
19. You've hung out in a parking lot.
Well... yeah, but I've done that in LA, too.
20. You know the difference between Richmond Rd., Richmond Ave., and Richmond Terrace.
Indeed I do.
21. You know that 'Mike' owns all the good diners.
They're so good. Seriously. So fucking good.
22. You refer to every highway on the island as "the Expressway."
I still do this in LA out of habit. People like to laugh at me for it. They can die.
23. You've driven down Bedel St. before it was built up to see if it was haunted.
I admit, this one stumps me. I used to be scared of the burned down old mental institution by my high school.
24. You've been to the Wave.
No, but I'd wager it was down on Bay Street.
25. You've been cut off by a souped up Honda Accord.
Fucking Guidos.
26. You have chased someone for cutting you off just to give them the finger.
Again, I live in Los Angeles. This isn't a Staten Island exclusive activity. Methinks the person behind this list is not a real Staten Islander. And did you see before when they used the phrase "pizza place?" Everyone KNOWS you call it a pizzeria. I smell a phony.
27. A development of townhouses has recently sprung up in your neighborhood.
No just ugly fucking houses in place of pretty old ones.
28. The shocks in your car are shot.
The roads DO suck.
29. You or someone you know suffers from respiratory problems caused by the toxicity of the garbage dump.
Thankfully, I can say no to this one, but there are very sick people living around that thing.
30. We don't have apartment houses, we have Projects.
This one is stupid.
31. You have the need to look at the people in the car next to you when stopped at a red light.
I don't get this one at all.
32. Your weekend hangouts in high school included Dock of the Bay, the Wave, the Caves, the Choir Loft.
Pssssh! I had no friends in high school. My weekend hangout was my room.