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This little global village- all over!

Member Since 2006

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Thursday Dec 28, 2006

Dec 28, 2006
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I am a maudlin melancholy mess of mayhem tonight.

Funny when you fly in at 7 am and one of your friends is like 'let's go dancing tonight' so you say yes, but because the friend was an idiot and invited someone who his sister was intimate (and there were complications) with the friend realizes he.can't.go so you've said yes to the group and the friend that invites you backs out. come to find out the new years party which started as a 'large party in Framingham' and became a 'large party in Somerville' OK a 'small party in Somerville' OK... a 'wee intimate gathering of friends' with no single women. (how the heck am I supposed to kiss a girl on new years? Hey brother wasn't your woman supposed to hook me up with some potentials? 'just use friendster or match or craigslist' yeah thanks a fucking bunch yo.

I hate to go down that path (cause well.. the truth of the mater is is that it makes me so much less attractive- and I'm aware of that) but I have no clue how to
a) pick up women in clubs/bars
b) write something for online dating that gets a response.

I'm lost. I have no clue. what the fuck is wrong with me? (god I've become the crap I despise most. the maudlin bitchy boy who says 'I'm um the best, why won't anybody look at me?!?!)

So I went dancing tonight. There was supposed to be a large crowd. it was me alone guarding the table till midnight. (I got there at 10:30) and I danced. and i looked beautiful. and I made men and women smile at me. But I don't understand the 'game' at all. the rest of the posse finally shows up. midnight 30. hey folks that's great. I have 45 minute drive home so I'm bouncing soon. bai bai.

online dating is such crap. "i want to meet a nice guy who's witty and will challenge my intellect and make me laugh and care for me... don't just wink , and have a picture, I'll reply..." hey there!... no reply no reply no reply.

-write a big long essay showing you've read her article... no reply
-write a witty statment cuase hey, people are shallow and they'll decide if they want to reply... no reply.

I wrote a bunch of ex's this holiday. (boy was that dumb) I sent them xmas greetings. some of them are married. i just wanted to say hi. some of them are single- and I thought I was in enough control to say hi and not be in a position of weakness *cough*LIES*cough*. Some of them are recent. some of them are 2 to 3 years old. None of them will reply. I've set myself up to pain. I'm a doofus. a gallant with a big heart and an over optimistic willingness to try to re-connect with people who hurt me in the past or I hurt.

But enough crap.

I'm caring and compassionate. I am smart. I love to cook and pamper. I'm good with my hands. I'm employed. I enjoy free time. I love to dance. I love to cook. I give good massages. I listen. I share. I am a bloody rock god! I have a sense of humor. I own a small condo. I cry at movies and look good on the dance floor. I am chatty. I am understanding. I get along easily with parents. I'm a great catch. My occupied female friends think I'm awesome. If the single girls don't see that. I DON'T HAVE TO BEG for it.

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