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baronsamedi

Tacoma, WA

Member Since 2006

Followers 1 Following 7

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Wednesday Feb 14, 2007

Feb 14, 2007
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How did my day start?

Some drunken old asshole threatened to swing for me on the bus, after badmouthing me. Part of the problem is I'd have REALLY liked to beat the shit out of the guy but though bigger than me he was old, drunk and broken down.

Get to the usual work hassle, and then for the first time in a long time I actually do something NICE for my ex, given that the two boyfriends she left me for are busy all today and tonight.

The thanks I get for doing something nice and buying her flowers is to walk into the fight she wanted to have, which centered around stupid me explaining something to my son which he repeated OUT OF CONTEXT to kids at his preschool, which resulted in them having a parent teacher conference, for which she blames me. Which I can't fault her for, but the short case of it is the picture they get of it is NOT what went down but it's not only reasonable to assume that, there's no way I can convince people otherwise.

So me just needing some fuckin space after a hard day and this morning's bullshit on the heels of "oh, flowers? Yeah. OK. You made us look bad again, and all the parents and teacher think you're a headcase" is her saying "oh yeah, and I got you something too (a couple of cookies)" which I was like "no thanks, look, just no. OK?"

The short of it:

If I do nothing with the kids I'm an asshole.
If I do stuff with the kids it's all wrong.

If I never talk to the kids, I'm neglecting them,
If I answer their questions, I'm being inappropriate.

If I ignore a holiday, I'm an asshole.
If I do something nice for it, "oh, uh, yeah. What's your real motivation? Oh yeah, fight."

So yeah, when she leaves and the kids leave, I am not returning phone calls. They will have no father as far as I am concerned. I'll pay the bills, but seriously, if everything I say, do, think, feel and want for them is so fucking toxic and unwanted, then I'll fucking pay the bills and never answer the phone.

That goes triple for relationships. Sorry that I snore, need to use the bathroom occasionally (wow, wonder why EVERY house has one), have off days, needs and wants of my own, etc.

I will have online friendships and a few close friends, but please world, don't expect jack shit out of me further than that. You've made your point, and I'll leave you the fuck alone too.

Oh yeah, and FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY


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