Had a change of mind. I need to be clear and honest with myself about what I am willing to accept and what I am not willing to accept.
I also need to be clear with him. I am not prepared to have a relationhship with a man who wants to nurture his " Best Friendship" with his recent ex of eight years instead of focussing on nurturing the equivalent bond with me. Focussing on his relationship with her creates no space for him and I to create an intimate bond together. I know what I want and I am not going to compromise myself for a man. I come first. If he can't make me more of a priority than his ex then he is still stuck in the past. In many ways I am also stuck in the past but I am in therapy and I am dealing with it. I want to let go of the past and move on and I need to know that he is willing to do the same.
I also need to be clear with him. I am not prepared to have a relationhship with a man who wants to nurture his " Best Friendship" with his recent ex of eight years instead of focussing on nurturing the equivalent bond with me. Focussing on his relationship with her creates no space for him and I to create an intimate bond together. I know what I want and I am not going to compromise myself for a man. I come first. If he can't make me more of a priority than his ex then he is still stuck in the past. In many ways I am also stuck in the past but I am in therapy and I am dealing with it. I want to let go of the past and move on and I need to know that he is willing to do the same.